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morethanonepage · 3 years ago

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@youandthemountains tagged me in a “talk about five favorite fics you've written” meme, so here we go, in descending order for the ~suspense of it all. also i’m tagging @aimmyarrowshigh , @jessicamiriamdrew, @lotus0kid, @whatever-you-can-give-me and anyone else who wants to do this meme, it’s fun, if more time consuming than expected.

also this is just going to be AO3 era stuff -- some of my peter/claude from heroes fic remains very close to my heart but i cannot and will not go and find it to link to ATM. i’m perfectly happy to see it disappear w/ the rest of LJ fandom.

5. Proprioception

this is the most popular fic i’ve ever written (2375 kudos and counting) so i feel like it HAS to be on this list by default, but i’m not really that fond of it. the gimmick was, clint and phil’s relationship through the years and through various people’s eyes (until the end, where it’s through phil and then clint’s eyes). as a writer i’m proud of my attempt to write the POV of characters i never would’ve written otherwise, and people seemed to like how i portrayed them, so that was good to know. i think the best chapter by far is the natasha one -- the others are a little bit hokey w not my fav dialogue (but like, given mcu dialogue in canon....). but even though it’s not my favorite or my best writing i do appreciate that the fandom enjoyed something i actually did something new and (to me) interesting with -- the POV switching and like, dramatic irony of who knows what about whom (esp in pepper’s chapter). plus look i eventually came to really hate tony stark as a character but both* times i’ve written him (see #4 as well) i think i was very fair and i think no one would’ve guessed i kind of found him very annoying in all the avengers movies (i liked him better in his own movies/thought he was better balanced w pepper and rhodey around).

representative passage:

Her nose has stopped bleeding. She removes the handkerchief that's been keeping her from...she's not sure what, really, it's not like her clothes aren't bloodstained and ruined already. She hands it over. Is she supposed to be expressing gratitude? Blue eyes are watching her warily, but she's past worrying about making an effort.

"It looks okay now," he says, and he's a terrible, terrible liar, but at least he didn't say it wasn't broken, and at least he hasn't apologized for it. He fiddles with the ruined white cloth for a while, twisting it between his fingers, and glances, just once, toward the man it belongs to. The man in the suit, whose pacing is probably wearing very neat tracks into the filthy hotel room carpet while he makes clipped, deliberate statements into his cell phone.

He is a much better liar.

*just remembered i’ve actually written him three times but the other was a v short rhodey/tony thing that’s not really worth talking about.

4. The Ice Is Getting Thinner

honestly i’m going to say this is the best clintcoulson fic i ever wrote. there’s a lot of moral ambiguity to it and (not to toot my own horn lmfao) a lot of just plain ambiguity to parts of the plot (i take a twisted amount of pleasure in my refusal to stating things directly sometimes), to the point that a few of the bookmark notes/comments mentioned that they had to read it twice to figure out exactly what was going on.

there are parts i still cringe at -- i was again very complementary to tony stark in his portrayal here but i think the dialogue i wrote for him was. not great. but overall i think it’s a fic that portrays a complicated long term relationship w ups and downs and breakups and makeups and secrets and lies and love and just -- the DRAMA of it all. also i think the structure of the thing -- parts of it are moving backwards and parts of it are moving forwards chronologically -- was to me very clever. like you’re getting the backstory of the thing and how it relates to the current narrative, until they meet up. very the last five years, though i’m not sure if i’d seen that before i wrote it.

and phil is a little darker/more morally grey than i usually wrote him/he was usually written by the fandom, which was also fun for me. it’s also a fic that’s about redemption and forgiveness and like...self forgiveness and making up for bad things you’ve done and also how SHIELD was/is pretty sketch at its core so even the well-meaning people within it are a little more complicated than all that. and there’s some good natasha stuff i think -- and some great like friendship stuff between clint, phil, and natasha that i wish i had explored more when i wrote this ship. i always found the ‘natasha just stands around shaking her head at the stupid boys who can’t get it together’ portrayal that showed up in fic a lot really annoying but i was so afraid of falling into that myself that i didn’t really write her a lot. but that’s a shame bc the potential for her to have a friendship with both phil AND clint was really great, even though we didn’t get much of it in canon.

representative passage:

Phil thought about it. Thought, later, that it might have been the closest he ever got to telling him.

But when Clint got off the plane, he draped one arm around Phil's shoulders, and the other around Natasha's. He was sunburned, smelled of salt and the sea and things Phil would never have associated with Clint, but it wasn't unpleasant. It was a reminder that everything he'd once known about Clint wasn't everything he'd ever be.

"My two favorite people in the world," Clint mumbled, voice weak from disuse. He kissed Phil's cheek, then ducked to kiss Natasha's, putting him slightly off balance. Phil wrapped an arm around his waist to steady him and Clint beamed, his side warm and jostling against Phil's. "Man, am I glad to be home."

Phil didn't tell him.

He began to understand that he never would.

3. a strong enough foundation

[obviously the title of this fic is inspired by the hamilton song “Dear Theodosia” (the Hamilton Mixtape version is the one i see as THEE shara bey dameron song) but i also pulled from the ~feels that come from ben folds’ “still fighting it”]

okay WELL this is purely a sentimental favorite. the travelogue fic. it’s one of the few gen fics i’ve ever written. and it’s a story that is incredibly personal to me, which requires a bit of backstory to explain:

basically up until she passed way, one of my aunts in Mexico was really devoted to taking me to like, important cultural places in Mexico whenever i went to visit her. so amongst other things, back when i was in middle school (so early 2000s i think?) we took a trip to Chiapas, which is the southernmost state in the Mexican republic that borders on Guatemala; it’s very rainforest/jungle heavy, lots of mayan pyramids just like. plopped down in the middle of a bunch of trees and vines and monkeys etc. it’s also very humid and green and there’s beautiful rivers and we slept in a little wooden hut with no electricity or a/c or anything, just a roof and a floor mosquito netting penning the space in/keeping us from getting malaria or w/e.

it was an amazing experience that really affected me and that i still think about a lot -- sadly, i went there before i had a good digital camera, so while i took a lot of pictures they were all on film and were not as good at capturing just how beautiful everything was. a part of me wants to go back someday, but i haven’t yet, so it still very much exists in my memory alone right now.

anyway! this fic is about Yavin IV and Poe returning to it to basically spend some time with his father and it’s about that family connection, too, but mostly for me it was about -- coming up with Yavin IV headcanons, which was a delight. there’s a lot about the mayan ruins (again, i’ve never been to Guatemala but i was in the jungles of Chiapas, which are very close, and the mayan empire in mexico vs the mayan empire in guatemala are not that different) which comes from my experience in the mayan ruins, and a lot about the town i kind of imagined as existing ties into my experiences in small mexican towns. there’s a lot about the market culture there, which was based on primarily the market in my mom’s hometown. one of the funniest/most personal bits for me was where poe and his dad go to a stand that sells fruit juices:

He makes it to Val’s before his father does and settles onto one of the red plasto stools in front of the counter. Makes idle conversation with New Val, who was a year ahead of him in school and was well known, even then, as the artistic sort. This seems to have born out: her stall is adorned with meticulously realized depictions of Massassi warriors and anthropomorphized trees sharing plasto-bubble drinks with a variety of alien races and such distinguished company as a young Leia Organa and Luke Skywalker in a well-intentioned approximation of Jedi robes.

this is a reference to a lot of food stalls in mexican markets, which often have drawings of all sorts of IP they definitely don’t have the rights to, like a lot of disney characters and so on. it’s also referencing the tradition of serving aguas frescas in plastic bags w a straw poking out, which is just a nice bit of nostalgia for me.

i did feel a little -- something -- about this fic being based so much on my experience as a mexican and thus very little on like, actual guatemala, which i could not really speak to, though i did include some references to actual guatemalan alcoholic drinks at least?

this isn’t a perfect fic -- every time i have to write OCs i feel like i’m floundering a bit, and this fic didn’t really have a plot so when it came time to end it i just --didn’t really know how to wrap it up. but in general it’s such a personal fic to me that i will always have a great deal of love for it.

representative passage:

“You’re so much like your mom.” That’s nothing he hasn’t heard before, but his dad keeps going. “I mean, you look like her, fly like her. When you’re pissed, you do this thing, with your jaw…” he reaches over to tap lightly at Poe’s chin; Poe ducks his head, a little embarrassed that his father’s noticed it. “Pure Shara Bey. And you’re smart, so damn smart, always were, and that’s all her. Sure as hell didn’t get it from me.” Kes father chuckles, shaking his head.

“Dad—"

“Thing is, that makes me forget, sometimes, how much you’re like me, too."

Poe turns to look at him — Kes is watching him, and his expression is worried, but more sad than anything.

“That’s not a bad thing,” he says, too quickly, but he means it.

(oh also lest i forget: the running thing about poe looking so much like his mom is there because a) it’s true, canonically but also b) when i was little but also now, whenever i’d visit mexico i’d hear over and over how much i look like my dad/my dad’s side of the family. so again this was a very self inserty fic in a way i’m usually embarrassed to admit and i guess am still kind of embarrassed to admit, but w/e, i’m doing this meme, might as well talk about it.)

2. Washington Square

WELL what can i SAY about this and its 50352 words? it’s the first NaNoWriMo thing i ever completed, and the only one i’ve ever actually posted. it genuinely did have a plot (which obviously i took from the movie it’s based on, so yknow). it’s an AU premise i love (i’m a sucker for Famous Person/Normie things), it’s explicitly queer in a way that actually affects the plot. i think a lot of fusion AUs like this one can be a bit find and replace character names w the same dialogue and exact same plot, so i took care not to do that. first of all the shifting of the setting -- from England to the US -- shifted the dynamic a lot, and at least partly exploring the issue of Finn’s sexuality and him being outed also felt like a much more modern and to me interesting take. (in fact if/when notting hill gets its eventual reboot/remake, it would make so much more sense for it to be a queer story).

i also feel like i did some subtle character stuff that maybe didn’t always pay off but that i was proud of: both poe and finn are kind of a mess in it, poe bc he’s been through a bunch of failed relationships (partly bc he puts his partners on a pedestal but is also a deeply moral person so if they show a moment of moral greyness he doesn’t react well) and finn bc well he’s bi and black and young and only just starting to make it in ~hollywood~ and he’s got a lot of pressure on him to be perfect on every level. and i thought that was a fitting adaptation of his FO backstory (i mention it in one of the last author’s notes, but the sunglasses he pointedly takes on and off are meant to call back to Finn’s stormtrooper helmet, while also being based on how julia roberts’ character wears sunglasses in the first scene w hugh grant in that movie).

i was also thrilled to be able to write so much of Black Squadron in as poe’s awesome/amazing/fun friends, using them to recreate on of the best parts of notting hill to me, ie, the fact that hugh grant has a wide circle of friends that chime in about his life and relationships etc. i’m not the biggest fan of rey but i also felt like i had to include her (and made her much nicer than her notting hill counterpart, obviously). and this was like, right amidst the small poe/c’ai era, so of course i had to include c’ai in there as the also-ran that would’ve been great for poe if he wasn’t so hung up on finn.

also, again, look: i wrote kyle ron in this and yes he WAS a bad roommate but i didn’t write him as mustache twirling evil/stupid AF, which is more than most reylo authors who write poe into their fics ever give me. so i deserve extra points for that.

there’s really only two points i’m kind of eh about for this fic: first, bc i didn’t think nude photos/video alone would be enough of a career jeopardizing event as it is in notting hill, i added a plot point where it was an m/m encounter, AND an element of dubious consent. this is the kind of thing that i think writers in general should tread lightly on/really be sure is necessary when they’re including it as a plot point. i’m not sure i would include it if i were writing it today, but when i was writing the fic we were in the midst of one of the earliest #MeToo pushes, PLUS i didn’t want to minimize the potential vulnerability Finn would have, as an actor and a black man and someone who came out of the foster system and wouldn’t’ve had that many people in his corner. so i tried to take it seriously and not be flippant about it, BUT i am still uncertain if i did a good enough job dealing w whether or not (or how much) finn saw it all as a traumatic experience.

the second thing i’m pretty uncertain about is the ending. i love the movie but even i find the ending a little unearned -- hugh grant’s character ends up being the one to apologize and basically beg for julie roberts’ to give the relationship another try, and her apology earlier on doesn’t feel like quite enough, to me. and so in my version i tried to...idk, given that the fight they have is a lot more tied to the sexuality issues, and finn is very early in his career and thus way more vulnerable, ultimately, than anna scott in the original, sets up a weird dynamic that a lot of commenters got caught up on: it’s funny though bc the two most upset comments i got about it were on opposite sides. One thought that Poe had been too much of a jerk in their fight and didn’t do a good enough job of apologizing at the end, while the other thought that Finn was too much of a jerk and Poe deserved better. so idk, maybe it did hit the happy medium after all.

(another thought poe saying “i love you” at the end was not built up to enough in the fic itself -- i disagree, imo poe was very obviously falling in love w finn from very early on, but since it was his POV he was trying to keep himself from admitting it until the very end).

representative passage:

Finn reaches out, cradles the back of Poe’s head with his free hand. Leans in, slow but inevitable. His fingers card through the Poe’s hair as they kiss, soft and sweet, almost chaste.

After a moment, Finn pulls back. Rubs his thumb at the side of Poe’s head. “You’ve got a — you’ve got this curl that sticks out the wrong way, here."*

“Yeah,” says Poe, still stunned — at this point he doesn’t know why, it’s not like Finn hasn’t done this before — and swallows. “Yeah, it does that."

Finn leans in and kisses him again. Longer this time, with a hint of tongue. Poe sighs, drops his hand to Finn’s chest, needing something to anchor him as the world starts spinning.

(also, i had originally planned to write a sequel from finn’s POV, which ideally would’ve allowed me to explore his character/backstory/trauma more, but some of the comments to the fic kind of dissuaded me from it and now i’m just -- so far removed from it i think it would be hard).

*this part is really reminiscent of a bit from song of achilles, which i still have not even read -- just saw that passage quoted somewhere -- and anyway that also struck me. i wonder if people noticed it/thought it was deliberate reference -- it was not! but i wish i could’ve said it was.

1. Adrift

OKAY so on some level i think of this as the best fic i’ve ever written. maybe it’s not even that good but it’s just -- genuinely, sometimes, i’m amazed i wrote it. i finished it surprisingly fast, for me, and it came much easier than almost anything ever has (writing is like pulling teeth for me most of the time). but basically it was just, as i said in the tags, a fix-it where what i was fixing was the cancellation of constantine (2014).

It’s what i would’ve wanted the show to end on, in an ideal world where i had like. control of the whole thing. both bc it’s based around the most famous hellblazer/John Constantine arc -- dangerous habits -- but it deals exclusively with the fallout and not the actual events around john’s having and “curing” lung cancer. mostly bc i didn’t want to figure out how to re-write that, tbh -- i feel like i would’ve had to do something to update it but i’m so bad at plot.

anyway it’s also a bit of a mystery story -- starting in media res does set up that question of, why is chas living alone in the middle of nowhere? why is he so mad at john? where has JOHN been? where’s zed? and it all just kind of...unfolds from there.

it’s got the domesticity, it’s got the two of them sort of finding each other again, it’s got the start of a relationship they both know is probably a bad idea but that eventually turns out to be more functional than either of them expected (no matter how much john keeps panicking about it eventually falling apart). i think i hit a good balance of john being snarky but self loathing but an unreliable narrator but also really observant at times.

in general i also feel like the sex scenes are earned and work very well with the actual plot/narrative arc -- like they start off very awks and distant and not mutually satisfying; and then they’re in a honeymoon place of, both finally having regular sex with someone and it being good but also still a little distant; and then finally just much more open and with a real connection (demonstrated through eye contact bc i’m basic and weak). and after that point all of the sex scenes are more vague/fade to black bc the explicit content isn’t the ~point anymore. for me it’s very well balanced.

and i like where they end up. both in terms of their relationship -- it feeling pretty well established and healthy as it could be, for both of them -- and in terms of their place in the world (about to get back into the ~solving spooky shit~ business, and also on better terms with zed to the point that she might also come back and join the ~team).

again not to toot my own horn but to me, this is how the characters eventually ended up, after the show ended, and that’s really just how i chose to see them.

Bonus Runners Up:

A Battle, A War, A Growing Up - STILL the only alex/darwin (xmfc) fic i’ve written, which i HATE MYSELF for, but at least if this is going to be the only one i’ll ever write, i’m proud of it.

inosculation, or, that time Javert panicked and stole a small child - really the summary alone makes this one worthwhile. the title is inspired by the POI fandom meme of “that time harold panicked and stole a small child”

want who you want (boys and boys and girls and girls) - the jake peralta/john constantine fic LITERALLY NO ONE would’ve ever thought to ask for, and that i’m still amazed anyone has actually read

Equuleus - the best thing russell crowe brought to les mis was making javert a horsegirl. i will die on this hill.

the fire and the flood - quality wise, i think this is pretty even with adrift in terms of chastantine fic. it’s only not included in the favorites list because it TOOK SO FUCKING LONG TO WRITE and i really hated it by the end there. at least i did something interesting w the timelines and vignettes.

#writing meme #YESH talk about a long post #i'm not going to cut bc tumblr is doing automatic trimming anyway but #ANYWAY here we are lots to talk about

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wingsofhcpe · 3 years ago

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SNOWPIERCER S3E6 THOUGHTS: IMPEACH LAYTON

No I don't even care actually I hate him.

Not just because he's killed Pike but because he's so goddamn self righteous about it. If any of you guys have watched AoT, and know of Erwin Smith's character arc (best morally grey leader ever), you'll understand what I mean.

Ruth thinking it was all a misunderstanding and she could "clear Pike's name"... I'm in pain.

Also since I mentioned aot, if this was an anime Zarah would have jumped in to save Layton or Ruth would have jumped in to save Pike. In any case, they would have ended up getting stabbed instead. Now that I think about it, that's a good fic idea... (Don't ask me why I constantly think in Anime Terms. It's just who I am).

And ofc she's gonna blame herself. Of fucking course. Kudos to Pike for not saying he's doing it for her even when directly confronted... but even the implication, the knowledge of it, is enough to drive someone like Ruth insane. She's SO gonna blame herself.

This episode basically confirmed that they really did love each other, that they were just...afraid. Especially Ruth. And now they're never going to get their chance at happiness because Pike was STUPID. Let's be real here, the core of the problem is with Layton, but Pike acted with the clear intent to end up dead. He truly believed the best part of him was dead, there was nothing for him to hold on to, and he wanted to go out at least trying to set things right, to prove that Layton is not fit to be the leader any longer.

Also the fact that he said he would never hurt the baby. Also Zarah idgaf about your ugly cgi doll, fuck you.

(yeah no ok I know she was scared and that's completely fair, I just don't like Zarah in general lol).

This week is mostly gonna be me screaming about Ruth and Pike but also I loved the little details about the Tail traditions. Good to see they remember Old Ivan even after all of this. Also hey Astrid's alive, good to know.

ALSO MILES. HE GREW SO TALL. HIS VOICE GOT DEEPER. MY BABY SON GREW UP.... I MISSED YOU MY CHILD!!!!! I MISSED YOU SO MUCH!!!! I'm so glad you didn't also die of influenza.

Carly's and Alex's interactions were adorable actually, also kinda gay, I ship it. (Though I will remain an Alex/LJ stan forever)

I feel real bad about Wilford and also I'm very angry re: Audrey, but after everything that happened this episode she can honestly go fuck herself (or Till ig).

Speaking of, the little interactions with Till and LJ. Big Sis Till is back and I'm loving it. No Os tho :((

I hope Roche survives at least. Glad to see him trying for Carly.

I love Lights so much and I wish she ended up with Till bc they're great together.

Asha is a mood, I too would like to hide in a dark hole with my comfort object in order to avoid people. She doesn't have as big of a role as I imagined though. At least not yet.

I can't even bring myself to explain why I'm so mad at Andre. Like the fact he literally only agreed to fight Pike because Pike threatened to expose his lies and destabilise his influence/leadership based on said lies... I think that's what really made me go against Layton. He didn't care about solving any of this, he just wanted to buy Pike off as usual, and when he realised he couldn't, and that Pike knew he was bullshitting the entire train, he decided to fight to the death. This is the biggest issue with his leadership and why he's no longer fit to lead.

Winnie putting her lil doll with Pike's dead body.... AND RUTH IS PUTTING THE BOMB IN THAT DOLL IN THE PROMO FOR EP7??? FUCK ME.

Also I've said that already but goddammit Ruth is just not allowed to be happy huh.

Closing this rant off with the fact that the drinking scene between Ruth, Roche and Till was gold. Just a few seconds, but honestly, vibes. I want a scene of them getting piss-drunk together in the next season. I'm talking WASTED.

Also I hope my prediction won't come true but I feel Ruth will start acting like Roche now. Just...more contained. She has a good poker face, unlike him.

Anyway. Till (haha) next week. Also if the show writers even CONSIDER killing Ruth off, I would like to formally announce that I will find you and I... I... I will steal all your snacks! So you better leave my wife alone!! >:(

#snowpiercer spoilers #snowpiercer #snowpiercer s3 spoilers #snowpiercer season 3 #andre layton #ruth wardell #joseph wilford #miss audrey #alexandra cavill #pike #melanie you need to come back asap this is getting SO out of control

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renee-writer · 3 years ago

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Lost Chapter 27 Safety Plan

AO3

“We need to bring in the lads.” Her hands on her hips, she stares her brother down.

“No one knows she is here.” Jamie retorts.

“Except for Laughaire and John. Now I ken John won’t speak of it but..”

“Neither will Laughaire.” Claire sits, snuggled against Jamie. The position made Jenny a bit uncomfortable, with the lass still being married and all. “She is my mate.”

She and John had left to give the evidence to the police. It was easily decided that Claire was to remain in the safety of Lallybroch. The police can come to her.

“Aye, but this man is pure evil. He will do anything to get you back.” She shakes her head. “Crips, she needs protection too.”

“John will see to that and I will see to Claire.” It feels strange to call her by her name. She has been Lady Jane from the first. Jenny still calls her LJ but, Claire fits. Sorcha, light, aye, she is truly Claire.

“Look, you stubborn Scot, we need them here also. Sociopaths are cunning. She needs as much protection as we can give her.”

“Who are the lads?”

“Our cousins, Angus and Rupert. They run a body guard service. Good at it, aye but…”

“My stubborn brother can’t get past the fact that Angus took a lass from him in year eleven. He is a strange lad, short with a air of extreme confidence. He does get more lasses then one would expect. “

“Jamie, are you afraid that I will fall for your cousin?”

“Nah, it is just…”

“James Fraser, speak the truth to me. I need that. After… Look all relationships have secrets. People need their hidden thoughts. But lies, no. Yes, I was going to lie to him about,” her hands go to her stomach to cradle the tiny protrusion that was starting to show, “but that was the polar opposite of a healthy relationship. This one, between us, I need it to be different. So no lies. I promise to speak only the truth to you. Will you do the same?”

“Aye,” He cradles her face, meeting her eyes. Jenny is still in the room but might as well be in the next planet over, for all the attention they pay her. “Aye, it is silly. We are not weans anymore but, I guess I am a bit concerned about that.”

“You needn’t be.” She finds his neck and her touch brings goosebumps. They are kissing, gentle and sweet until Jenny’s loud throat clearing gets their attention.

“So, may I call the lads?”

“Aye.”

She snorts. “I can trust you not to commit adultery whilst I am gone?” subtlety is not Janet Murray’s strong suit.

“You can.” He glares at her and she glares back. Yes, the lass is still technically married to another. But, Christ Alive, it isn’t that she will be much longer! Even with his eyes communicating that, Jenny just shakes her head and heads out.

“I guess we ought to talk about it.” Jamie nods.

“Aye, she is right but also wrong. You are technically married but…”

“He is a monster that should soon be locked up behind bars.”

“Just so. If you wish we shall wait until then, until you can get a divorce. Because this isn’t just a fling, a way to scratch an itch. I have never felt for anyone the way I feel for you. If we wait, it will be fine because we have the rest of our lives.”

She catches her breath. “Jamie I, from what I can remember, I thought I was in love before. That he was my future. I must have to marry him. But, I was so wrong. It is you. You who holds my heart and guards it so carefully. Who has found this lost soul and rescued it. We shall wait. Not because I think it is wrong but, because this is to important not to be perfect.”

“I….”

“They are on the way.” Jenny breezes back in, leaving his words, unspoken. But, she sees them in his eyes as he does in hers.

#my writing #outlander fanfic #lost #safety plan #jamie and claire #cannon divergence #outlander fandom #modern au

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jandjsalmon · 4 years ago

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FICS I’VE READ THIS WEEK (50)

Hello everybody!

My Lucille Austero update: I am no longer holding the walls as I walk. The medication appears to have done its job. Still quite a bit of pressure in the ears though - so who knows if it’ll be back after the drugs are done. I’ll keep you posted. Thank you to everyone who reached out. I adore you all.

Secondly - I actually watched live last night for the first time since last April. It was a good episode to watch in real time. The commentary here was (as always) top notch and I felt our collective laughter at the sheer lunacy.

Lastly - it’s Easter weekend for those who celebrate - I hope you enjoy your ham and pie and hot-crossed buns - and that you remain healthy and safe while you enjoy them. If you feel inclined, I would love to know what you eat traditionally on this holiday. Any recipes to share? 😘

Anyway - here is my reading list for the week of March 26-April 01

Weeks 1- 46 (3251 chapters)

Week 47 (66 chapters)

Week 48 (58 chapters)

Week 49 (93 chapters)

Week 50 (74 chapters)

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BUGHEAD - 14

everything i love is on the table by @flwrpotts (chapter 2)

Up a River by @sunshinebunnie (1/1)

Game Night by @sunshinebunnie (1/1)

Betty by Nightrebel (1/1)

make it new by @sullypants (first chapter)

December, can you hold my heart? by @winterlovesong1 (1/1)

Dreamscape by @winterlovesong1 (1/1)

Easier by @winterlovesong1 (1/1)

Regrets Collect like Bullet Shells by @loveandcoffeeandsimplicities (chapters 24 & 25)

The Island by @likemereckless (chapter 12)

Becoming Eleanor by @srainebuggie (chapter 6)

find him by @fallout-mars (1/1)

sing that lullaby once more by @winterlovesong1 (1/1)

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Bughead Rereads - 11

your love was handmade (for somebody like me) by @anniemurphys (1/1)

if i told you who i am (can i call you baby?) by @thetaoofbetty (10/10)

---

MISCELLANEOUS - 11

The breeding program by Chevalier_Barthelemy (Five/Vanya - chapter 9)

The Beavercide by PegLegPI (Dick Cassablancas/Mac Mackenzie - 2/2)

We Interupt with An Important Message About Blocks by @sokorra (Dick/Mac - 1/1)

Counterplay by @alexandra-emerson (Draco/Ginny - chapters 17-20)

Four-Letter Words by @which-chartreuse (Lenny/Miriam - chapter 2)

In Through An Out Door by @djgrannyglasses (Hyde/Jackie - first chapter)

And now I'm stuck in the moment (and my heart is open) by @pichitinha (Peter/LJ - 1/1)

---

Misc. Rereads - 38

Mansfield End by Ione (Fanny Price/Henry Crawford - 1/1)

Everingham by katharhino (Fanny Price/Henry Crawford - 24/24)

Until the wilderness cried aloud (and their souls stretched tight across the skies) by @elixirbb (Ben/Rey - 10/10)

we never go out of style by @hallie-society (Harry/Allie - 1/1)

gave me the blues and then purple-pink skies by @in-my-head-i-do-everything-right (Harry/Allie - 1/1)

they may be lies, but say that we'll be alright by @livinginrhythm (Harry/Allie - 1/1)

#reading fics with jandy #fics i've read this week

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skekzok-the-ritual-master · 4 years ago

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Out Of Character Questions

ROLEPLAYER GET TO KNOW YOU PROMPT

Tagged by: @hedonistschambers

Tagging: @ask-skeksa-the-mariner, @allpowerfulemperor, @asktheornamentalist, @askurva-thearcher, and anyone else who wants to :)

OOC About Your Character(s)

1. What do you want to get out of playing this character(s)?

I used to RP on Tumblr a lot in the Megamind fandom, and seeing other Dark Crystal RPers on here made me want to try getting back into RP a little. Since I don’t have any Dark Crystal OCs who lend themselves well to RP, I decided to go with a canon character, and skekZok was a prominent one who hadn’t gotten a blog yet. I’ve always liked looking at characters and thinking about what makes them tick, so this gives me a fun chance to do that for him.

2. Describe your character(s) with three words.

Cultured | Sadistic | Hypocritical

3. What made you decide to write this muse?

I’d been following the blogs of a few other Skeksis RPers, and the absence of Zok had been remarked on. Since he’s one of my favorites, I decided to make a blog for him and join in the fun.

4. If you could change one event in your muse’s life (in their main or canon verse), what would you change?

That’s a tough one, because Zok really doesn’t suffer that much in canon compared to other characters. I might stop ZokZah from trying to burn out part of his soul, but skekZok wouldn’t exist and there wouldn’t be much of a story if I did that. (If we include the JM Lee novels, I’d change it so he doesn’t throw skekSa under the bus.)

5. If you could tell your muse one thing, what would you tell them?

“Don’t stab the blonde Gelfling girl. It won’t prevent the prophecy, and she’ll just come back to life anyway.”

6. If you could give your muse one gift, what would you give them?

I’d love to see his reaction to a Swiss Army knife.

7. If you had to take one positive thing away from your muse, what would you take away?

I’m not sure how positive this is, but I’d take away his ability to believe his own lies. It would be interesting to see how he tries to juggle all the conflicting rules and stories he’s come up with over the centuries.

8. If you could “borrow” one aspect of your muse and apply it to yourself or your own life, what would you borrow?

His talent for speaking in public. I wish I could command an audience like he does.

9. Do you genuinely want your muse to be happy? What do you think would make them most happy in life?

Considering the kind of things that tend to make Zok happy? Maybe. As for what would make him happiest, he believes it would be achieving immortality and remaining one of the highest-ranked of the court and having skekSa as his permanent mate, but that still won’t heal the spiritual emptiness inside him. Much as I enjoy Zok and Zah as separate beings, I do think reunification was the best thing for them. If he and SaSan could have been together after that, that would have been even better.

10. Do you enjoy putting your muse through angst? What do you think would break their heart the most?

I don’t mind angst in small doses, as long as I plot it out with the other player(s) beforehand and we agree how it will turn out in the end. Zok doesn’t lend himself easily to angst, but losing his place in the court hierarchy or having one of his allies turn on him would do it. He’s also come to genuinely believe the mythology he’s invented over the centuries -- anything that seriously challenged that worldview would be hard for him to deal with.

11. What do you love about your muse?

A lot of things. His charisma, his striking blue eyes, the way his voice is deeper and smoother than most of the other Skeksis, how over-the-top his gold outfit is, how he’s so attached to his headdress that he doesn’t even take it off in the spa, how unrepentantly creepy and sadistic he is -- he’s a very enjoyable character, even if he is a horrible birb.

12. What do you hate about your muse?

He's not an easy character to have interact with everyone. He can pretend to be nice when it suits him, and he’s not totally incapable of caring about people, but he’s still nasty enough that I can tell in advance a lot of interactions wouldn’t go well.

13. What about your muse amuses you?

The contrast between the austere image he tries to keep up, and how frazzled he gets when something upsets that image (”MY CARRIAGE!”). Also when he gets sarcastic or looks down on the others when they act in a less-than-civilized way.

14. What about your muse makes you sad?

All the people he’s hurt, and how unwilling he is to see that his way of life isn’t sustainable and won’t truly make him happy in the end.

15. How would you describe your muse to someone about to meet them, in person, for the first time?

“This guy is a creep, but he believes in good manners. Tread lightly, and you should be okay.”

16. Would you like your muse as a person if you met them in real life?

LOL no. He’s an awful person who is best left in the realm of fiction.

17. In what ways are you better than your muse? In what ways are they better than you?

I like to think I’m a much nicer person than he is. I can be blunt and a bit of a troll sometimes, but I really don’t like hurting anyone, or trying to force people to do stuff they don’t like. As for Zok, he’s much more confident and well-spoken than I am, and he’s had the determination to stick with one job for a thousand years.

18. Why do you think you connect to your muse?

We’re both interested in culture, myth, and history, and feel better when we can assign some order to the world around us.

19. What aspect of your muse’s personality is most important to you? What aspect of your muse’s personality do you think is most important to them? Is it the same? Why or why not?

As I see it, the core of Zok’s character is that he wants to bring order to the world; that’s why his job title is ‘Ritual Master’ rather than ‘High Priest’ or something more overtly religious. If he can’t see an obvious reason why things are the way they are, he’ll invent one that makes sense to him (and serves his needs).

I think this is what Zok sees as his most important trait too -- in his mind, he took a bunch of feral newborn creatures who (by all rights) were never meant to have existed in the first place, and helped turn them into a civilized, godlike people who rule an entire planet. But that feral nature is always under the surface, and they still need ritual and order (and yes, punishment) to keep it in check.

20. Has your character(s) changed over the time that you have been playing them? How have they changed?

I haven’t been playing Zok for very long, but I’ve recently had a chance to write how he feels about deeper questions, like what it would mean for Skeksis to have children, and what happens to Skeksis and urRu souls after they die. I think it’s made him a bit more three-dimensional.

About You!

1. What is your name?

Kate, a.k.a. Crow or Lady Stormcrow

2. What is your profession?

Social worker, currently working in substance abuse treatment.

3. What do you do to relax?

Watch favorite TV shows, play video games, listen to music, hang out outdoors, chat online.

4. What is your favorite treat (desert)?

I have a big weakness for flan and other custard desserts. Also caramel.

5. Favorite movie

Amadeus (1984).

6. Favorite book

Good Omens (and yes I loved the series too).

7. Favorite vacation spot

Grand Cayman. We were supposed to visit again this spring, but COVID happened.

8. Favorite Disney movie

I’m not sure I have one favorite, but I love Fantasia and The Rescuers.

9. How did you first get into role playing?

Almost 20 years ago, lol. When I first started going online in high school, I made an online friend ( @ksclaw ) who introduced me to the concept. We played interactions with our SWAT Kats fan characters, and she helped me get the hang of it.

10. What was your first platform? If it was something other than Tumblr, what made you get into Tumblr?

It was Livejournal. I discovered Tumblr in late 2011 after my friends in the Megamind fandom introduced me to it, and most of us migrated here from our old LJ community. I loved being able to reblog whatever struck my fancy, and while my interest has waxed and waned, as you can see I’m still here.

11. What’s a grammar rule you find yourself breaking or ignoring a lot?

I like to think I have pretty good grammar. I know I’m guilty of run-on sentences, though, and I overuse ellipses and mix up ; and -- far too much.

12. Are there any languages besides English in which you think you could comfortably roleplay?

Not really. I can speak and understand a little Spanish and French, but not enough to write anything meaningful, and I’m wary of translation software for anything beyond a short sentence. Sorry!

13. Do you listen to music while your write?

Sometimes. Usually not when I’m doing the actual writing (that’s distracting, and I like to hear the words in my head), but I’ll listen to it beforehand to get myself in a mood or get some inspiration.

14. Are you a morning, day, evening, or night writer?

Late morning after I’ve had my coffee is usually my best time. Unfortunately I’m usually at work during that time, but on slow days and weekends I try to take advantage of it.

15. How does tiredness affect your writing?

It turns me into a zombie who can dream but cannot actually write.

16. What is your biggest obstacle to writing every day, if time doesn’t count?

Lack of motivation. I daydream and imagine stuff easily enough, but putting it down into writing is much harder, especially when I’m braindead from work.

17. How many drafts is a paralyzing amount?

More than 5 is daunting, though fortunately Zok hasn’t gotten that many yet.

18. Is there anything character-wise or writing style-wise that you can’t stand?

Players who are unwilling to have their characters be in the wrong, or who get upset if my character doesn’t react the way they wanted. Not all interactions are going to be smooth and happy, and I’m fine with that. Your character is not you, just like mine is not me.

19. What kind of anonymous questions are your favorite?

Weird ones. I like having my muses react to them.

20. What is your weakest point in writing? Angst, fluff, dialogue, etc.?

Fluff is kind of tricky. I don’t have trouble imagining it, but I get paralyzed thinking “this is too indulgent, I shouldn’t publish it, no one but me will like it, etc.” Maybe that’s part of why Zok appeals to me, because he’s not the fluffy type.

#ooc #writing

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my-sherlock221b · 5 years ago

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Speak the Truth--not mine, sharing from the link

https://speakthetruthj2.weebly.com/intro--start-here.html

"What we’ll do for each other, how far we’ll go, they’re using that against us"Everything from this site has been taken from the wonderful Speak The Truth on Storify-- HERE

Do you know your J2 history? The story of Jensen and Jared is an epic one. It is at first deceptively simple. But with a wider view, this seemingly small story tells a much larger, more universal one. In that way, it's also an important one. It's one that spans a time of unique change in American culture as social media tools grew, TV became King, fandom ways were integrated into public lexicon, HW powerhouses rose and fell, and a new hope for true equality in Obama's America supplanted the country's long history of intolerance. It's one that showcases how the role of PR can build over time to consume all levels of actors lives, even two guys who first set out to avoid exactly that. It's one that reveals the widening sphere of PR with the advent of social media, celeb blogs, and online fandoms. Fans are no longer immune to being used by PR as tools in the role of creating an illusion and selling an image. Only together in one place do cracks in the veneer and patterns of PR tactics suddenly emerge as the larger picture focuses into sharp view. It's also a story that I hope one day can be told in full by the people who lived it instead of mere spectators who watched from the cheaper seats and speculated from afar. However, human interest pieces begin with a subject. So here it is. I've been a fan of this show for eight long years. As someone with a "librarian mind", I have saved and documented a lot throughout that time, as have others who have helped me along the way. Supernatural, the TV series, I believe, speaks for itself. 160+ episodes have been produced, aired, and immortalized on DVD. However the larger story that encompasses the show, the actors, the crew, the fans, the HW machine, and the subject of its time, remains hidden if not completely erased from documented fan history. Yet it is one that has enraptured many (even those who won't quite publicly admit it). I believe that counts for something. In other fandoms, I am indebted to other fans who came before me who archived events as they occurred for other fans like myself who came along later. As I leave Supernatural fandom for good, I worry that these details, as we observed them, may be lost. There will be other fans, of the show and of the Js, that will come after me. They should know how it went down all those years ago. This here is merely my small act of scrawling on the cave wall of the internet. As far as I know, there exists no complete record of what a J2 fan has experienced in all the years of the show. So what follows is a timeline summarizing the events of all eight years of Supernatural surrounding its two lead co-stars. It's meant to serve as an J2 archive or library, detailing each event with a date, info, pics, tweets, article, links, videos, and quotes. Most of the focus is on J2 and the players around them, but it will cover show changes and larger HW shakeups in later years as it becomes necessary. If a tiny splash of "Time Capsule" feel snuck in, it's because we all have our experiences and sometimes they feel worth telling. There has been an incredible erasure of fan/show history the last couple years, an act that is rather ironic in a fandom built on the concept of urban legends coming to life. In its wake are attempts to rewrite J2 history. There are some people that have worked very hard to make sure this story is as inaccessible as possible to others. They'd rather see it replaced by their own "revisionist" history that best serves their own interests. But this stuff happened. Records of it are out there. Fans experienced it. And in many cases, J2 or other people directly connected to them responded to it. Denying said part of J2 fan history is disingenuous. Believe what you want to believe in the space between, but events that happened have happened. I know some people will not be happy I have put this together. I struggled with the thought myself. Ultimately, I believe their story in between the lines and cracks of this cobbled together timeline is endlessly iconic. It's a story that shouldn't be lost in the dust of internet time. Because its not just them, even though their unique relationship is quite remarkable. It's that their story has something to tell us all. We all have something to learn in the space in between. You read through the cracks of eight years, follow along detail by detail, and it however small allows you to step in their shoes, no matter who you are, or what you originally thought. Just think, how scared does someone have to be, how many pressures must be put on someone from all angles, your advisers, your bosses, your family, your friends, to agree to these measures over time. When an erasure of a genuine human story happens, we all lose. We, ourselves, as a culture lose. Progress loses. (And what are we here for, if not for progress?) That erasure robs us of that example to learn and grow, improve and teach others. Because no one's life is just their own. We all have a part to play in each others' lives. We all have things we can teach and things we can learn. That's never been more true than the global age of the internet. Thus, as someone who has been in a unique position to watch a lot of these events unfold, I couldn't leave fandom in good conscience without leaving this footprint. They say history is written by the winners. Well, that was before the internet. So fair warning, I will use spn_g links in later years. It is impossible to do an exhaustive archive of J2 without it. Like it or not, it's part of J2 fan history and quite an archival resource when so many LJ links have since been deleted. Careful consideration has been given to the source. Priority is given to the most reliable information. Events (e.g. things we've seen with our own eyes pics, videos, quotes, tweets, etc) are all primary, and denoted by a header font and date. All anon ITK ("In-The-Know") info is considered secondary, and only becomes more or less probable depending on how it fits in with the overall timeline. Thus, some events with "more probable" secondhand information, are noted as an addendum by the phrase, "*rumorhasit:". Unsubstantiated gossip has been left out. This archive is done with the utmost respect for both parties. In a way, it is only in the details that the more real human context emerges. This is something lost in the day-to-day celeb gossip and fandom life. It's easier to make snap judgments about an image than about a fully fleshed out person. My hope is that in seeing the totality of their story, readers can find some form of compassion for the subjects at hand. I've taken great pains to make sure that the record that follows is all of public events only. If they've been released on the internet in a public place, and talked about by fans, they are included here. I've written this in a way that I hope can be a resource for all, both for J2 fans who lived it and those who have yet to make sense of the whole story. In the act of putting this together, even I have learned details that I had forgotten or missed. It's almost a decade of details, it's a lot to keep straight, but I hope that in this timeline format, the clearer picture emerges. If it's the first time you're reading this, just take it in stride. But if you're a fan who lived all of this once already, pay special attention to the timing of events and larger patterns. Watch how appearances and big personal news tend to go together with big professional news like movie casting and season renewals. Notice how players like publicists and managers fit into the story along side girlfriends and fiancees and wives. This is how this industry functions, even with a fledgling show on a netlet. It's in this industry that two guys who initially claimed privacy start indulging fans with stories of their personal life. It's in this climate that a TV show built on two actors' chemistry suddenly tampers said chemistry down to nothing in the middle of its seventh season. There are many threads that pop up here, partly why this story is such an important one. Some things are rarely as they appeared at first glance. Other things are exactly how they appeared at first glance. Decide on your own which ones are which. One can look at this as an archive with two distinct parts. The first four years are more a tribute to the little glimpse we got of two guys with an instant bond that captured us all. The next four years are more a testament to how despite an actor's best intentions, HW can still grab you by the shirt collar and suck you dry. Never forget where the real power of any show lies. Not with the people whose creative work you watch every week. It's those at the top. And they are not as "tolerant" or "liberal" as people might like you to believe. The story of J2 is an epic one, but that's not the only reason why it's important. They're also not the first or last to deal with these extreme machinations. As we proceed into 2013, we are reminded over and over again how much our culture has changed since 2005. Since 2008. Even since 2011. How much longer will it take for HW to catch up with the rest of us? I'm indebted to all the fans who helped me in amassing this record, adding their contributions, holding my hand, listening to my complaints, and overall sharing in the J2/Supernatural obsession for good times and bad. This has been simultaneously the easiest and hardest show to be a fan of. But it would have been impossible to follow for eight years if not for the community of amazing people that I shared it with. Some of them may not understand this, many of them will probably not even read this, but I hope that they still know my thanks and appreciation. Schmaultz aside, we've got 8 years of history to get to! So without further ado!

#j2 tinhat #speak the truth

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fyeahcodegays · 5 years ago

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suzalulu fics for when ao3 isn’t enough

a couple of gen mixed in, but if you have rose tinted shades they’ll work fine

btw these aren’t necessarily exclusive to ffn; some authors have imported their works between sites and thus you might come across something you’ve read in ao3 already.

I may or may not have been depressed that I can’t find fic recs besides this one (which has a lotta good fics, I thrived here) and the lj rec lists dont even load so yeah.

on another note, in the midst of making this, I also found this fic rec (the best playground for my angst loving heart tbh) so I decided to remove the overlaps I found.

i’m personally a fan of dark fic (more like unhealthy codependence) so there’s that I guess

1. In Birdcages | toujourspret

Escaping is only the illusion of freedom when your wings have been clipped.

2. Guileless | J Plash

“Stay with me,” Suzaku whispers, and pretends he doesn’t see the lie when Lelouch says “okay”. Because Lelouch can’t be Zero, not again. All the evidence proves it. And Suzaku couldn’t love Zero like this.

3. To Err Is Human | tastes-like-ciel

All Zero had to do was string together a few words to bring the knight to his knees. Suzaku never stood a chance and Lelouch never saw the betrayal coming.

4. The Enemy Of My Enemy Is My Friend | tastes-like-ciel

Zero and Suzaku call for a truce in order to defeat a common enemy in their never ending war for Lelouch’s affections. Their enemy’s name? Gino.

5. Excused Absences | YamiPaladinofChaos

Maybe Zero’s meeting with his secret lover?“ The Black Knights discuss their leader’s absence.

6. Scarred But Not Stronger | YamiPaladinofChaos

Suzaku always makes Lelouch stand up again, even when neither of them really wants it. Nunnally and Suzaku, after Kaminejima.

7. Abandon Thyself | Sanjuno

“The strongest soldier cannot balance long upon the blade that does divide his honor and his heart, and whatever way he falls, the cut will kill him.” ― Susanna Kearsley, The Firebird

8. Sleeping Beauty | tastes-like-ciel

And so the brave and noble Prince Suzaku rescued the lovely Princess Lelouch and, in doing so, created a fairytale bound to be told long after they were dead and gone. AU. NOT a Genderswitch.

9. Battleship Grey | tastes-like-ciel

On the day of Nunnally’s kidnapping, Suzaku was absent because of military duties. With no one to aid him, Lelouch was forced to face Mao on his own.

10. Leading Moves | elarielf

Lelouch may be the “girly” one and the “uke” in the relationship, but the whole world knows who wears the pants in his and Suzaku’s relationship.

11. Just Another Game | elarielf

Lelouch takes Suzaku to one of his chess matches, only this time Lelouch loses. The other player orders Suzaku to screw Lelouch over the chess table while he watches.

12. Higame | elarielf

Suzaku thought that all the times Lelouch went out to gamble with Rivalz they were really having sex.

13. Retribution | spare

But somewhere between grabbing Lelouch by the collar of his shirt and shoving him against the wall and glaring into his eyes—one violet, the other glowing red even in the dim light, Suzaku had miscalculated.

14. Get Your Hands Off My Girl… Er, Guy… | elarielf

AU, in which Suzaku and Lelouch go to a club with Rivalz and a guy starts to flirt with Lelouch… So Suzaku gets angry, and at the end they start to fight for Lelouch.

15. Walk On In | Tainted Ink And Paper

Lelouch had an odd habit of taking strays… especially unwanted ones. Suzaku, the Japanese biker who waltzes into his home without permission, comes with more baggage than he can handle… like the Black Knights, like Zero.

16. Mismatched Yarn | Cat In My Fridge

Because in the end, when everything else had been stripped away, there was still one thing Lelouch had to give: himself.

17. All That Remains | LawliPop

Something terrible has happened.

18. Forever, With You | VirtualDraconium

They thought Zero Requiem would be the end of their problems. However, due to unexpected events a considerable amount of time later, the two are brought together once more. Very post-turn 25.

19. Requiem | LawliPop

It was the word on everyone’s lips. A quiet murmur that steadily grew louder with each passing second until it evolved into a celebratory chant.

20. Pure Hearted Love | DnKS-giRLs

What if, instead of waging war against Japan, Britannia sought after an alliance by arranging a political marriage between them? What if the two parties involved was Lelouch vi Britannia and Kururugi Suzaku?

21. Snapshots | DnKS-giRLs

A collection of one shots following the event of Pure Hearted Love. Some mere snapshots portraying the live of Lelouch vi Britannia and Kururugi Suzaku as the royal couple of The Holy Empire of Britannia.

22. Juicy Footage | Coral Blush

Gino thinks Lelouch is sexy, and Suzaku wonders if it’s possible to break his friend’s fingers when no one is looking.

23. In My Memory | KiraxMomo

When all you have are memories, you cling to them. When those memories start to fade, what do you do?

24. Twisted | pretense

“Protect Lelouch and Kill Zero… Well isn’t that just grand?”

25. Mosaic | abovethenightsky

Through the years, the pieces fall into place. It takes Lelouch and Suzaku a little while to learn, but eventually they do. Follows the dynamic duo through R1 and R2, and cycles of fluff, angst, and forgiveness.

26. Revision | DnKS-giRLs

After the regicide, Zero found himself walking to Emperor Lelouch’s bedroom with fear in his heart. Yes, this is a CRACK fic.

27. The Royal Command | Seto’s Darkness

After defeating Britannia in a bitter war, Suzaku Kururugi is the Prince of Japan who takes a liking to the purple-eyed prisoner, Lelouch.

28. At The World’s End | Seto’s Darkness

Lelouch has always copied Suzaku, the stronger of the two of them. And Suzaku will always protect Lelouch, no matter what.

29. The Moments Between | Zure96

After Charles erases Lelouch’s memory of Zero and Nunnally he has another plan for him before sending him back to Ashford to draw out C.C. Placed in Suzaku’s care, will the newly appointed Knight of Seven abuse his power? Or will he do his duty?

30. Windowless | ucco

Euphemia may hold the title of being Suzaku’s girlfriend, but she’ll never own his heart.

31. The Elegy of Suzaku Kururugi | Coeurlito

The Zero Requiem was not the end. For Suzaku Kururugi, it will never be the end.

32. Thunder and Lightning | Jynova

Thunder and lightning. Two different words denoting the same entity. Two parts of the same phenomena, separated only by the expanse of time. Lelouch Vi Britannia/Lelouch Lamperouge/Zero/99th Emperor of Britannia/Emperor of the World, strikes so brightly. Suzaku Kururugi, plain and simple in his thundering justice.

33. Wrong | faecree

After Euphie’s confession to him, Suzaku simply felt wrong. And, when something feels wrong, isn’t the best way to properly remedy the situation to counter it with something “right” instead?

34. Safe and Sound | Lovelily Lion

In a different world they were ordinary boys caught in a dystopian society bent on watching them lay down their lives. Lelouch grieves over the lover he never had and Suzaku finds a way to get back to him at all costs.

35. Ariadne’s Thread | anlaaria

It could have been perfect. Inception AU.

36. the disloyal order of sunflowers | tenshiplz

Marianne’s eldest son—eight years old and proud of it—the eleventh Prince to the Britannian throne, had attempted to escape three times in the past two days over that wall, but this fourth time was the charm.

37. Fanfic ABCs | Cat In My Fridge

Turning lesbian seemed like the logical thing to do when Suzaku and Lelouch kept being MIA having sex in yaoi fanfiction. At the time, anyway.

38. Retrograde | Libek

At the end of R1, on a whim, Lelouch receives a very different punishment for his actions. Now everyone must deal with the consequences. Themes of “white” slavery, and yes, he does now technically belong to Suzaku.

39. A Friendly Chat | Vermillion Lies

Emperor Charles and Suzaku have a brief conversation regarding memories.

40. Behind Those Wonderful Double Grand Doors | DnKS-giRLs

That day, the four ladies of Ashford Academy heard some very interesting things behind the closed door of student council room. And what part exactly does aloe gel play in that?

41. Selfish | shimo hyozan

If he was just given the chance, he would’ve been selfish.

42. In Loving Memory | Strawberry Scented Paperclip

An accident has left Suzaku with no recollection of the past two years. He doesn’t mind much, but who’s that dark haired stranger haunting his dreams, and why is his girlfriend acting so distant?

43. The Emperor’s Waltz | realms of fic

Empires may grow and crumble, but music plays forever.

44. Seeing Double | elarielf

Two Suzakus teaming up against Lelouch, Rock'n'Dolless’s Kiss doujin style. Consensual; semi-public outdoors. …because there can’t be too much Suzaku?

45. Absolution | ficshun

Suzaku must make a choice when confronted with the truth of Zero’s identity.

Bonus Round: cgkinkmemeii fill personal faves

Lelouch is alive with a code, sex with Suzaku ensues

Lelouch turns to Refrain, dubcon

Lelouch switch between good au and canon

Suzalulu RP as each other

Photographer!zaku

Decayed by rex_sun sidestory (by rex_sun)

MMORPG pk Zero

Student Council/table-kun

Continue? [Yes/No]

Lelouch has fujo fangirls

Cold!lelouch, Passionate!zero

Conflicted!zaku after R1

eyes are windows to the soul

post-R1 non-con

ghost!lelouch

#suzalulu #suzalulu fic rec #ill make a personal top 20 list later or sth idk bcs ao3 also has a lotta underappreciated fics #this is what I spent my entire summer on #angsty gays angsting #fic recs #protip: stalking the favorites tab of suzalulu stans on ffn is my new favorite hobby

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preserving-ferretbrain · 6 years ago

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Red Seas Under Red Skies

by Wardog

Friday, 01 February 2008

Wardog praises with faint damnation~

I was nosing about Scott Lynch's LJ (which is endearingly titled The Dork Lord, on His Dork Throne) not so long ago and I came across this:

I was not a fan of the Wheel of Time books, probably because I came to them in my twenties with my tastes already fairly developed. I was never able to get past the opening of the second book, and those of you who've known me for ages I'm sure absorbed my criticism and invective years ago. I once wrote at excruciating length upon the weaknesses of the books as I perceived them, and while I thought it was extremely clever and somehow necessary at the time, the years since have drastically mellowed my taste for mocking the work of other authors who aren't huge assholes in person or pushing a distasteful agenda with their work. About the best I can say for my mosquito bites is that I sincerely hope Jordan himself never had them called to his attention. Something tells me he would have given them the eye roll they deserved.

And the sheer decency of it has sort of shamed me to such an extent (especially since I am a non-achiever who hangs about on the internet criticising other people's work) that I can hardly bring myself to review Red Seas Under Red Skies, especially since my attempt to write about The Lies of Locke Lamora degenerated into a (semi-harmless) mock-fest of Scott Lynch's hair. By the way the important word in that sentence was "hardly." With this mind and all due humility, here are some thoughts on Red Thingies Over/Under Red Other Thingies, which I shall hereafter refer to as RSURS for the sake of my sanity. It's the second book in the Gentleman Bastard sequence which will, I understand, eventually form a septet. I have to say, this idea distresses me. Not only has Harry Potter soured me on the number seven for life but, given the fact the fantasy genre generally can't cope with trilogies, the idea of a septet seems utterly ludicrous to me. I mean, what do you have to say that takes seven books? Seriously?

For the moment, however, Scott Lynch seems to have something to say. Ultimately there's no point in reading RSURS if you haven't read The Lies of Locke Lamora not because it doesn't almost stand alone but because familiarity with the background, the setting and the characters deepens the experience of reading. To give it due credit: RSURS is reasonably satisfying on its own terms. You can feel the slow gathering of plot upon the horizon like distant clouds (and fear the coming storm) and there are some massive danglers just left hanging in a deliberately taunting and irritating fashion but, hey, thems the breaks with this kind of thing. And, as in Lies, the mysterious Sabetha, the apparent love of Locke's life, is alluded to but remains absent: for fuck's sake, Lynch, stop it. You know she's just going to be a total let down after a build up like this.

The problems evident in Lies are evident in RSURS, only slightly moreso because you don't have the novelty factor of being a first book to distract you from them. If you didn't like Locke the first time round, you won't like him here because he's exactly the same and still, some might argue, something of a Mary Sue or the male equivalent thereof. Although I don't personally object to the love affair Scott Lynch is tenderly enacting with his (anti)hero, I do struggle somewhat with the character. As I think I said in my review of Lies, he's absolutely the nicest bastard you could ever hope to meet: he never harms or kills anybody who doesn't thoroughly deserve it, his supposedly long-dead conscience miraculously reappears whenever he's confronted by any sort of cruelty or injustice and his unswerving and self-sacrificing loyalty to his friends is a virtue of such magnitude that it eclipses everything remotely unsympathetic about him. It shouldn't, but that's the way fiction works: if your character cares about the same people as the reader, it doesn't really matter how that character behaves, they're always going to garner a degree of support and approval.

I wouldn't mind this so much if I didn't have the feeling that Locke is supposed to be a shady character for a dark world. Perhaps I have the wrong end of the stick and Locke was never meant to be anything but a big bleeding heart beneath a thin veneer of survivalist criminality but I don't think so. I think the problem with Locke Lamora is that he's neither enough of one thing nor its opposite: he's neither selfish enough to be a convincing anti-hero nor virtuous enough to be a convincing hero. I know part of his shtick is his shifting sense of self and I'm not averse to complicated, contradictory characters but I find Locke incoherent rather than complex. I'm genuinely uncertain as to what Lynch is trying to do with the character or what we're meant to think. I'm not saying he doesn't do terrible things - he mutilates someone (who, admittedly, deserves it) in the first book - but everything he does that's vile and shocking is excusable whereas everything he does that's compassionate is extraordinary. For example, in RSURS, he and Jean, hanging out a decadent casino called the Sinspire, witness an entertainment in which a young nobleman, unable to pay his debts, has to survive in cage of stiletto wasps. Needless to say he doesn't and Locke secretly makes a blessing over the young man's forgotten corpse:

"Crooked Warden," Locke muttered under his breath, speaking quickly, "a glass poured on the ground for a stranger without friends. Lord of gallants and fools, ease this man's passage to the Lady of the Long Silence. This was a hell of a way to die. Do this for me and I'll try not to ask for anything for a while. I really do mean that this time."

There is no reason for this scene to be in the book (not that it isn't cool) - there are plenty examples of the upper classes being cruel and bloodthirsty to make the point and if the stiletto wasps are at all relevant beyond providing atmosphere they're certainly not to this book. In fact, its only purpose is to remind us that Locke Lamora is great and to show him, thief and conman that he is, being humane in the face of the world's inhumanity.

Unlike some of the reviews I've read, I've never had a problem with the snappy, modern dialogue and the very modern obscenity. In fact, I genuinely relish it. Unfortunately, it was during RSURS that I realised something that had passed me by in the first book: it's the only kind of dialogue Lynch can write. Everyone sounds the same. Pirates, noblemen, thieves, priests Locke, Jean: they're interchangeable. Witty but interchangeable.

"And now, my dear professional pessimist," said Locke... "my worry merchant, my tireless font of doubt and derision ... what do you have to say to that? "Oh very little to be sure... it's so hard to think, overawed as I am with the sublime genius of your plan." "That bears some resemblance to sarcasm." "Gods, forefend," said Jean. "You wound me! Your inexpressible criminal virtues have triumphed again, as inevitably as the tides comes and go. I cast myself at your feet and beg for absolution. Yours is the genius that nourishes the heart of the world." "And now you're-" "If only there was a leper handy," interrupted Jean, "so you could lay your hands on him and magically heal him-" "Oh you're just farting out of your mouth because you're jealous."

And so on. And here we have Jean talking to his ladylove:

"Have you really been practicing on barrels Jerome?" "Barrels. Yes. They never laugh, they never ridicule you and they offer no distractions." "Distractions?" "Barrels don't have breasts." "Ah. So what have you been telling these barrels?" "This bottle of brandy," said Jean, "is still too full for me to begin embarrassing myself like that." "Pretend I'm a barrel then." "Barrels don't have br-" "So I've heard. Find the nerve, Valora." "You want me to pretend that you're a barrel, so I can tell you what I was telling barrels back when I was pretending they were you." "Precisely." "Well ... you have ... you have such hoops as I have never seen in any cask on any ship, such shiny and well-fit hoops-" "Jerome-" "And your staves! Your staves ... so well planned, so tightly fit. You are as fine a cask as I ever seen, you marvellous little barrel. To say nothing of your bung-."

See what I mean?

I think in my review of Lies I commented on the deftness and subtlety of the world building - well, in RSURS, the action has moved from a city made of elderglass to a city consisting of islands made of elderglass. Astonishing. And sadly the delicacy of touch seems to have been replaced by the typical fantasy fiction obsession with geographic detail. It's nowhere near Perdido Street Stationbut, as much as I enjoy Lynch's world, there's a bit too much of this sort of thing:

Tal Verrar, the Rose of the Gods, at the westernmost edge of what the Therin people call the civilised world. If you could stand in thin air a thousand yards above Tal Verrar's tallest towers, or float in lazy circles there like the nations of gulls that infest the city's crevices and rooftops, you would see how its vast, dark islands have given this place its ancient nickname. They whirl outward from the city's heart, a series of crescents steadily increasing in size, like the stylised petals of a rose in an artist's mosaic.

And so on for two or more pages at a time. A bit like this review really.

Also it has to be said, the plot makes no sense whatsoever. It attempts to follow the embedded narrative format of the first book but it feels strained: Lynch occasionally plays with chronology, explaining how events came about after they occur, and offers a few reminiscences but it's noticeably a device now, rather than the most natural vehicle to tell the story. And, like the first book, it begins with Locke and Jean mid-heist only to drag them - reluctant and swearing as ever - into much bigger events, allowing the plot to twist, turn, double back on itself and eventually come full circle in a strangely satisfying manner. Except this time, it turns out that the Archon of Tal Verrar wants them to become ... wait for it ... pirates. Yes. Pirates. Two conmen from the streets of Camorr. Pirates. Now, I know that pirates are just inherently cool and you can't go wrong with them but still, come on. What's next? Locke Lamora and some ninjas? Locke Lamora and zombies? I don't know whether to respect the sheer brass bollocks ludicrousness of it or complain bitterly because it has to be the most spurious excuse for a plot I've ever encountered. And the fact that even main characters complain about the stupidity doesn't actually counteract that stupidity:

"Send us out to sea to find an excuse for you, that's what you said," said Locke. "Send us out to sea. Has your brain swelled against the inside of skull? How the screaming fucking hell do you expect the two of us to raise a bloody pirate armada in a place we've never been and convince it to come merrily die at the hands of the navy that bent it over the table and fucked it in the arse last time."

This is Lynch's latest technique, by the way, one I think he might have borrowed from JK Rowling. He seems have developed a tendency to address the inevitable plot holes of his novels by having his characters draw attention to it. To be honest,

fridge logic

doesn't bother me - I don't care how Buffy the Vampire slayer pays the mortgage on her dead mother's house or how Sydney Bristow circles the globe in half an episode - but attempting to pass it off as anything other than what it is offends me. Having the Archon blackmail Locke and Jean into mustering a pirate armada for political reasons is little more than a blatant excuse for the author to have them messing about with pirates, which is in itself fair enough. However, having Locke and Jean constantly bitching about the insanity of the plan even as they enact it only serves to induce bouts of fridge logic before you're even anywhere near the fridge. It also leads to odd little moments like this:

"Why not?" [said Jean] "Why not? We carry your precious misery with us like a holy fucking relic. Don't talk about Sabetha Belacoros. Don't talk about the plays. Don't talk about Jasmer or Espara or any of the schemes we ran. I lived with her for nine years, same as you, and I've pretended she doesn't fucking exist to avoid upsetting you. Well I'm not you. I'm not content to live like an oath-bond monk. I have a life outside your gods-damned shadow."

Err...actually Jean, you're a sidekick. Haven't you noticed? You actually do not have a life outside Locke Lamora's gods-damned shadow. The more Lynch tries to demonstrate to the reader that Jean is a person in his own right the less convincing it becomes. All it does is illustrate the fact that whatever Jean does on his own account is completely meaningless because his only relevance is tied to his supporting role, a role to which he will always return. His short-lived relationship - although actually moderately engaging, while it lasts - is only further evidence of this. You can see its inevitably tragic conclusion approaching on the horizon like the sails of the good ship Obvious.

The other thing I'm feeling a little bit peeved is Lynch's reliance on a technique he seems to have ganked from Alias. Now, I'm not sure if it continues in the later seasons but the early episodes of Alias always end with a cliff-hanger. And at first I used to get tremendously caught up in them. Oh no, I'd cry, Sydney is hanging from a cliff with only her suspender belt between her and certain death. Oh no, Sydney's rival has locked her in the poison-gas filled vault. Oh no, Sydney is being held at gunpoint by the bad guys. And then I'd insist that we watched another episode to find out what was going to happen, only to be faintly disappointed when the desperate, deadly situation resolved itself harmlessly in about two minutes of screen time. RSURS opens with Locke and Jean caught at crossbow-point on the docks and then, gasp, ever-faithful Jean turns on Locke. The novel then spools backwards in time to show you how they got themselves into this mess and, yes, it's arresting except that it's basically just like Alias, a cliff-hanger critical on the surface but ultimately completely meaningless and wrapped up quicker than a streaker at a tennis match. A couple of similar situations happen over the course of the book and, despite the satisfactory resolution of the plot, there's one left right at the end. I suspect I'd be more interested/frustrated by this Tense and Terrible State Of Affairs if the experience of the rest of the novel hadn't led me to the conviction that it's merely there for affect.

Okay, so I've just written four pages of bitching about RSURS but the fact remains that, despite its flaws, despite everything in it that doesn't quite work for me, I still heartily enjoyed it and very nearly loved it. Pirates, for God's sake, pirates! It's not quite as taut as the first book but once Locke and Jean hit the high seas the pace really picks up and the book becomes wonderful fun, sweeping you along on sheer exuberance and panache. And, damn it all, that's good enough for me. Roll on book three.Themes:

Books

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~Comments (

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Arthur B

at 01:09 on 2008-02-02It strikes me that the Gentleman Bastard series embodies a problem I have with lots of fantasy series, namely that one book is really enough. I've felt absolutely no urge to go and read RSURS, and most of the things you point out in the review cement that; sure, it seems to be more of the same, and that's well and good - at least it's not a serious decline. On the other hand, one

Lies of Locke Lamora

is enough for me - having read one book, I don't feel as though anything the other books say can really add anything. (I'm also utterly unconvinced that there's enough juice in the Gentleman Bastards concepts to fill 7 books. I mean, for goodness' sake, he's only on the second book in the series and already he's resorted to pirates.)

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empink

at 02:49 on 2008-02-02@ ArthurB: Forsooth, he *will* go to ninjas next.

You know, I had more faith in this guy. I thought he'd at least 'fess up about Sabetha whatshername, or tie the book back to the first one, or do something other than send Jean and Locke to cavort with pirates for no good reason. It made for fantastic cavorting and rather dull and simplistic reading, though-- I won't be buying any more sequels in hardback, or holding on to them out of guilt either.

Oh, and Kyra, the DIALOGUE. Everyone does sound the same, it's so boring. No one is allowed to be stupid, or say frightening things without twisting themselves into witty shapes and cursing fit to kill themselves. It was all right in the first book, but in RSURS, it starts to look like lack of imagination on Lynch's part.

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Arthur B

at 12:04 on 2008-02-02Yeah, I can think of several points in the first book where I had to start reading a conversation again from the beginning because I lost track of who was who. It's this really weird blind spot in Lynch's writing; he can, when he tries, differentiate between characters in terms of disposition, personality, and so forth, and you can tell that by looking at their actions. (To pick the most obvious example, Jean is far more inclined to charge headlong into a fight like a raging bull than Locke is.) But he's chronically incapable of differentiating them when they're speaking.

I can only assume that he finds dialogue difficult (and to be fair, dialogue

difficult), and is trying to compensate by finding a style of dialogue he's quite good at and applying it to everyone.

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Wardog

at 14:23 on 2008-02-04I'm glad the dialogue thing isn't only me ... it's the main problem I have with the series to be honest, despite all my trivial bitching above. After a while, it gets really wearing and the characters all start blurring into each other because I find that it's language rather than behaviour that distinguishes people in books - heh, she says, massively generalising.

I think I must be less bothered by "more of the same" than Arthur is - I genuinely enjoyed both books and I'll happily read more (although I've never splashed out a hardback of either, so the cost of my good will is significantly cheaper than Empink's!) as long as they stay on this kind of level (or get better!). I do find them a nice antidote to ponderous, serious fantasy. I genuinely dig the exuberance and the irreverence.

Also I've been poking about Scott Lynch's personal sites and he seems like a pretty decent, charmingly humble guy...

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Cheriola

at 16:16 on 2014-07-26You know, oddly most of the things you mention didn't bother me at all. Except the utter pointlessness of the opening cliffhanger.

The only thing I did have a problem with is the way Jean shames Locke out of his depression, and Locke keeps apologising for "letting Jean down" in those few weeks for literally the next two years. I mean, in this book, it still reads like he's just mourning/recuperating a little too self-indulgently and maybe like he has a really short bout of alcoholism - but since the next book starts pretty much the same (except Locke has even more good reason to be depressed), and Jean then actually makes a reference to some kind of mental disorder (more something like Freud's innate death wish than depression, but still), it becomes problematic in hindsight. Especially since, either intentionally or not, Locke pretty much reads like a textbook case for bipolar disorder (spending most of each book in a manic phase), if you read all 3 books right after another. So for largely-neurotypical Jean to go "If I can handle our losses, why can't you?" and being sucessful at shaming/angering Locke out of suicidal depressive phases, that's rather problematic in my eyes. I know it fits with the setting that nobody has a clue about modern psychology and how Locke's mood issues are a disease, not willful misbehaviour, but Lynch should find a way to make at least narratively clear that Jean isn't right to do this. Besides, that kind of shaming would just make things worse with a real depressive person.

By the way, I'm fairly sure Locke is supposed to be a straight up trickster hero. Like Robin Hood, or the characters of the show "Leverage". He's not just a crook, he's also a priest and he really does believe in his duty to the dead and that holy mission for class revenge that Father Chains put them all on. (Even if this was retconned into this book and not in the first.) If anything he gets ever kinder from book to book. I think the third one literally points out that Camorr culture is particularly brutal, macho and homophobic compared to all the other city states, and much of Locke's initial darkness is part of his culture (like for example an extreme belief in having to take personal, blood-feud style vengeance) and that this is supposed to be a character flaw. But as he spends time in other cultures, he grows out of some of it. For example, in the first book, he calls the villain homophobic slurs several times. After encountering the queer-positive pirates in the second novel and that little discussion with "I'll try anything once - or 5 or 6 times" guy, he never does that again. And by book 3, when encountering a random pair of gay lovers making out in a garden and being tempted to go through their discarded clothing for their wallets, he stops his kleptomaniac impulse by reminding himself that doing malice to happy lovers would be bad karma.

Also, the losses of his friends, the brush with alcoholism and several with death have seemed to have made him a lot more sympathetic with other people's failings and tragedies. I actually really liked this character development. Yeah, he starts out as a bit of a cock-sure, obnoxious ass, but he does grow up and mellow out over the years, as one should expect.

Heh, but one character actually goes into a rant in the 3rd book about how Father Chains ruined them all for life as hardened, greed-motivated criminals by saddling them with a conscience. So I guess Lynch sees your problem.

By the way, can you really call a character a Mary Sue if literally none of his grand plans for cons ever work out, sometimes because of his own sheer stupidity (e.g. forgetting the cats), sometimes because his mark is just plain cleverer than him (e.g. the paintings), and the author takes an almost perverse delight in beating the crap out of him on a regular basis?

And, as in Lies, the mysterious Sabetha, the apparent love of Locke's life, is alluded to but remains absent: for fuck's sake, Lynch, stop it. You know she's just going to be a total let down after a build up like this.

I thought so, too, and got annoyed at the on-the-pedestal-putting. But now that I've read book 3, which features Sabetha both at about age 30 and when they were both teenagers: She's not. She's really, truly not. In fact, I was genuinely amazed at Sabetha - she's the best feminist (NOT straw-feminist!) character I've ever seen a male author write. And even if half of her discussions with Locke function mainly to introduce the male part of the audience to concepts like male entitlement to female sexuality, Nice Guy behaviour, Shroedinger's Rapist, victim blaming, the general frustration inherent in being an ambitious, highly talented woman in a patriarchal society and the frustration of being in love a with patriarchally socialised guy (who messes up occasionally even if he tries very, very hard not to, and who can't help the unfair male privilege that said society gives him), and that what feminists most want in a man is the ability to listen and learn - even if she's a bit of a mouthpiece in that regard: It's for a good and noble cause, and the author's heart is in the right place. And besides, there still is a clever, head-strong, angry, conflicted, and of course snarky character behind all the Issues. Her characterisation and reasons for leaving are thoroughly believeable, and also function as an Author's Saving Throw by actually pointing out in-text that the worldbuilding in the first book was problematic. Locke and Sabetha are still in love when they meet again, and they are surprisingly mature about their falling out and their attempts to fix it (if not in their professional rivalry...)

And Locke's adoring pedestal-putting, claiming her to be the love of his life, and his whole fixation on her are just that, quite literally - and the text seems aware that it is creepy, and the only thing that saves it is the fact that Locke is absolutely respectful of Sabetha's wishes and never, ever would force so much as a kiss on her. (I found the retconned-in reason for the fixation a bit sad, though: Until book 3, Locke could be read as demisexual for only ever being romantically/sexually attracted to one person. Then it's retconned as having creepy magical reasons that I don't want to spoil.)

The only thing about Sabetha I found a little... amusing, was that teenage Locke was almost too understanding and willing to accept anything feminism-related that she says and to change accordingly. Like I bet the author wishes he was at the age of 16, now that he finally gets it. Still, again, if it serves as a positive role model for male teenage readers, I'm fine with that kind of Mary-Sue-ism. Maybe it's a little preachy, especially since Lynch tries to cover so many topics, but I was just smiling through the whole thing. We do need more books like this.

The con plot of book 3 is a bit meh (basically it's a satire about 'democratic' elections, where Sabetha and Locke are press-ganged into controlling the campaign of one rivaling but politically indistinguishable party each, with all methods allowed short of murder, all ostensibly just for the entertainment of the people who really control the power in this 'republic' - their lives are being threatened to keep them in line, but it just doesn't have the personal stakes and sense of danger that the previous books had), and the teenage flashback is largely about the gang having to stage an annoyingly faux-Shakespearean play while conning a noble into paying for the production. So the relationship between Locke and Sabetha and the object lesson in how to make feminism 101 easily digestible in a fantasy novel, really are the main draws of the book. The meta plot for the series gets going right at the end, though. Which to me felt a bit like jumping the shark, but YMMV.

But I really do recommend the 3rd book, even if the plot is a little weak. Just for the sheer surrealness of reading a male author who manages to get practically everything right with regards to feminism. I mean, I've just read Elizabeth Bear's "Carnival" thinking she must have been the one to teach Lynch - but even she had like two dozen points in that ecofeminist polemic that made me headdesk.

(That book also needs a Ferret review, by the way. It's not thoroughly bad, as such, but the social philosophising made me uncomfortable and I wasn't always sure if I was supposed to be, and the worldbuilding has huge holes at least from my biologist/ecologist point of view. Still, queer protagonists are rare and deserve a mention.)

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Robinson L

at 20:15 on 2016-12-21

Cheriola: You know, oddly most of the things you mention didn't bother me at all. Except the utter pointlessness of the opening cliffhanger.

That pretty much sums up my feelings about the book, too. I guess I just think of this series as running on Rule of Cool and nothing else. Locke and Jean become pirates? Sure, why not? Doesn’t make sense? Who cares? And of course they’re going to complain about how ridiculous the Archon’s plan for them is, but that’s part of the fun.

Dialogue’s all the same? Ehn, so what? It’s all fun. And like you, I relish the modern snappiness/obscenity.

I mean, I don’t blame Wardog or Empink or anyone else who is bothered by this stuff, but just for myself, it seemed fine.

Wardog: I genuinely dig the exuberance and the irreverence.

That’s me, all the way (well, more like ~90% …)

I think the series is of two minds about whether Locke is actually supposed to be kind of an awful person or a stand up guy who happens to be a criminal—but as explained in my comment to the

Lies

review, I’ve chosen not to engage with those aspects and treat the whole thing as a rollicking adventure yarn. I will, however, once again point out a couple instances from this book of Character We’re Supposed to Root For Acts Like a Shitheel and Is In No Way Critiqued For It By the Text presently.

Re: description

And sadly the delicacy of touch seems to have been replaced by the typical fantasy fiction obsession with geographic detail.

Okay, here we come to a criticism I wholeheartedly agree with. Ye GODS but the description got tedious at times. It got tedious on

audiobook

; I shudder to think of trying to slog through it in text format.

I didn’t so much resent the book ending on a cliffhanger – although by the time I got to it, <Republic of Thieveslt/i> was already out, so I knew I’d be reading the next installment in a few months. Mostly, though, I was just relieved the cliffhanger revolved around Locke’s survival rather than Jean’s, because there’s a chance, however slight, of the series killing off Locke’s sidekick before the final book, whereas there’s absolutely none with Locke. So I appreciate the book making it absolutely clear that it’s not really a question of

the poisoned character will survive, but

how

His [Jean’s] short-lived relationship - although actually moderately engaging, while it lasts - is only further evidence of this. You can see its inevitably tragic conclusion approaching on the horizon like the sails of the good ship Obvious.

I think you undersell the extent to which the tragic conclusion was telegraphed beforehand. We’re talking

a MegaBrooks at the very least

. And I don’t think it would be humanly possible for the way it played out to have been any more cliché. Not to mention the whole fridging angle. Easily the lowest point of the series so far for me.

I thought RSURS handled the aftermath of said inevitable tragic conclusion a heck of a lot less annoyingly than most other books with similar big deaths I’ve encountered, though (lookin’ at you,

Harry Potter

). Jean is, of course, grief-stricken, and the book portrays the depth of his unhappiness while mostly avoiding an Epic Angst Sequence (seriously, there are few things in fiction less engaging than characters sitting around moping), and even sets up some genuinely touching moments, such as in the immediate aftermath of Ezri’s death, when Locke talks Jean down by threatening to throw himself at Jean, forcing the latter to beat the crap out of him (Locke), “and then you’ll feel terrible.”

Yes, pretending Jean is anything more than Locke’s sidekick is on par with “suddenly, Harry realized Dumbledore had actually been a fully-fleshed, three-dimensional character the entire time.” (Book 3 confirms this, when, after Locke is all patched up, Jean slips happily back into his role as Locke’s Number 2 without a hint of lingering grief over Ezri’s death, even as he’s helping out his best buddy romance Sabetha.) However, I thought the conflict between Locke and Jean set off by this outburst of Jean’s you quote in the article was actually pretty decent in terms of a “tensions between the series’ Main Pairing” subplot, which are usually of the eye-bleedingly terrible variety.

And what’s this guff about “moderately engaging?” I found it one of the two most engrossing parts of the story, along with some of Locke and Jean’s interactions. Jean and Ezri are adorable in every single scene they’re together: they bond over martial arts (with Jean being impressed that tiny Ezri actually managed to take him down at first), and their mutual affection for the Gentleman Bastardverse’s Shakespeare analogue. And then there’s the celebration scene where the two of them officially get together, soon after Jean has had his argument with Locke. And he’s keeping his distance from Ezri and it seems like at first he’s heeding Locke’s “you need to stay away from her, bro” bullshit, but it turns out, no, he’s craning away because he’s near-blind and he’s trying to see her properly and it’s incredibly cute you guys, like seriously.

Another thing I really like about the Jean / Ezri relationship is that the presentation feels balanced. I instantly get why Ezri is attracted to Jean as much as why Jean is attracted to Ezri, and in that scene during the celebration where, of course, Jean is being all shy and awkward, there’s a part where we suddenly see Ezri being shy and awkward as well. I’ve read a lot of similar romance arcs—especially those told from the male perspective—where the viewpoint character is vulnerable and complex while their love interest is all strong and confident and basically put on a pedestal.

I actually found it more engaging than Locke’s relationship with Sabetha in

Republic of Thieves

. While I agree with Cheriola that Sabetha is a great character, we don’t get much sense of her interior life, and the only times she displays vulnerability are when it directly relates to Locke. Also, it takes a long time into the story for her to tell Locke and the reader why she’s attracted to him, and I don’t feel the text really

shows

her being attracted the way RSRUS does with Ezri.

RSURS opens with Locke and Jean caught at crossbow-point on the docks and then, gasp, ever-faithful Jean turns on Locke. The novel then spools backwards in time to show you how they got themselves into this mess and, yes, it's arresting except that it's basically just like Alias, a cliff-hanger critical on the surface but ultimately completely meaningless and wrapped up quicker than a streaker at a tennis match.

Oh my god, that was the worst; maybe even worse than Ezri’s death.

I detest flash-forward openings as a general rule. I feel like there

may

have been one or two I’ve encountered which actually worked okay, but if so I can’t remember them now. Those possible examples aside, at best, flash-forward openings contribute f***-all of substance to the story, and at worst they undermine immersion by distracting the reader from the current action with questions which aren’t going to be answered for another 200-400 pages.

To be fair, some flash-forward openings, while still crap, sometimes do something clever with the reader’s expectations (I remember one where a guy wakes up and wonders what the heck is going on, and when we get to that part of the book in turns out the original guy died, and this is a clone, so that waking up sequence is technically his birth). RSURS is not one of those stories, though. The sequence takes on no new significance or added meaning for having read the rest of the book up to that point.

But wait, it gets

better

! Jean turning on Locke is in itself not terribly surprising: they are master con artists, after all. The linchpin (no pun intended) of the tension to this scene is that Jean fails to give the hand signals which mean “this is a scam, play along,” leaving Locke, and the readers, to wonder if this is a real betrayal, after all. Then, after Jean has dispatched the two assassins he says: “Oh, yeah, didn’t you see me giving the hand signal which means ‘this is a scam, play along’?” and Locke is all like, “Gosh, man, I must’ve missed it.” And that’s an end to it. Are you f**king kidding me?

Granted, this sort of stuff happens all the time in real life, but narratively speaking, it’s the worst kind of cheap trick for creating false tension. It

might

have been forgivable if there were some long-term consequences to the whole business. Locke and Jean have both been dosed with a slow-acting poison at this point in the story, and I thought maybe Locke’s failure to notice the hand signal was an early warning sign that the poison is beginning to effect his perception. But

. Or maybe Jean really was considering turning on Locke for some reason or other and then had a change of heart, and made up the part about the hand signal. No sign of that, either.

Look, I’m glad Jean doesn’t actually betray Locke, because as story turns go, that would have been at least as irritating as Ezri’s death, probably worse. But first you hit me with this bullshit flash-forward, then you double down on the bullshit by revealing the whole thing was just a trifling misunderstanding with no effing consequences whatsoever? What a waste of time.

… So yeah, on balance, I was not well pleased or amused by this sequence, especially as our hook into the main story.

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Robinson L

at 20:30 on 2016-12-21And now it’s time for another installment of Robinson Dissects the Ethics of the

Gentleman Bastard

Books. This week’s episode: Captain Zamira Drakasha Edition.

So yeah, Zamira is all kinds of awesome, but like with the other main characters, it’s best to turn one’s critical thinking off when thinking about her actions, or it becomes very hard to think of her as any kind of hero.

Case in point: she takes Locke, Jean, and the rest of their sorry crew onto her ship as probationary pirates. You do good, you play by the rules, you become full crew members; you step out of line, you die. All pretty standard stuff, except it turns out when she says she will kill you for breaking the rules, she means it.

One of the guys who originally signed on with Locke and Jean now despises the two of them intensely and is kind of an asshole in general, so the reader is primed to dislike him. He’s getting picked on by some of Zamira’s crew members, and finally he gets pushed too far and grabs a weapon to defend himself with. But laying hands on a weapon is against Zamira’s rules, so she has him executed on the spot. For the kind of mistake that anybody could make. And the reader is supposed to be okay with this because the guy was made to be unlikable. It could just as easily have been someone like Jean or Locke making a similar mistake, prompting Zamira to execute them, and the reader to hate her, in turn. We’re not invited to judge her character based on her actions, but on how we feel about the characters she acts against.

Later, there’s the time when we first see Zamira’s

Poison Orchid

attack a merchant ship, which involves pretending to be in peril themselves. As the pirates are preparing to board the ship, one of Zamira’s lieutenants tells the new recruits “if any of you are feeling moral qualms about attacking these merchants, just remember that they thought we were in distress, and only came to help us when we signaled we were willing to give them unconditional salvage rights.” Which, if you stop to think about it, is a

really

clever rationalization to psych people up to potentially commit an atrocity. I mean, if that were the point of the sequence—which it isn’t—I would’ve said it was brilliant. For all they know, the captain of the merchant ship was just a huge asshole, and literally everyone else aboard was clamoring to help the

Poison Orchid

right from the beginning.

It also seemed like, in the three way struggle between the Archon, Stragos; the proprietor of the big gambling den, Requin; and the members of the Priori; Stragos winds up being the Designated Villain of the book, not because his actions are worse than those of Requin or the Priori (we’ve already established they can be equally vicious), but because it happens to be Stragos’ actions which got Jean’s girlfriend killed. He gets punished, whereas Requin and the Priori members get happy endings, only because Stragos hurt someone the reader is supposed to care about.

Locke and Jean are quick to forgive the Priori member who was sending assassins after them because the Bondsmages told him the two Gentleman Bastards were going to cause him trouble. Which, okay, the assassins all failed, and all got killed, but by the logic of this story they were probably all Bad Men who deserved what they got, so no harm, no foul, right? Except, no, there

was

harm. One of the attempts to kill Locke and Jean was a really convoluted scheme to give them free drinks which were laced with poison. And the thing about convoluted schemes is that they’re full of holes, as in this one where Locke and Jean weren’t interested in the drink in question, and passed theirs on to the dockworker at the next table, who proceeded to die in their stead. No one in the story ever gets any kind of comeuppance for this murder, ‘cause I guess we’re not supposed to care about red shirts.

So basically, what I’m trying to say here is that the ethics of this series are all kinds of messed up if you look closely.

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Robinson L

at 00:00 on 2016-12-22

Cheriola: book 3, when encountering a random pair of gay lovers making out in a garden and being tempted to go through their discarded clothing for their wallets, he stops his kleptomaniac impulse by reminding himself that doing malice to happy lovers would be bad karma.

That was cute. Another very minor point I appreciated from that book was in a scene where Locke has to hold Sabetha as part of this play they’re performing and the narrator (speaking broadly from Locke’s perspective) talks about what it’s like for someone to hold another person whom they’re attracted to. It would have been

easy to gender the subject of attraction in that sentence as female, or to say something like “a person of the opposite sex whom they’re attracted to.” But no, it’s a general statement, and so the book sticks with generalities, not making stereotypes about the genders or orientations involved. Again, a minor point, but one I’ve seen even a lot of nominally well-intentioned works fail at, so I was mildly impressed.

I was genuinely amazed at Sabetha - she's the best feminist (NOT straw-feminist!) character I've ever seen a male author write.

I think it was this part which finally clinched it for me to read the series. As a male author myself, I can’t help but take it as a challenge.

As mentioned earlier, though, I feel like we didn’t get much sense of Sabetha’s internal life, except as it relates to Locke, and she has to tell Locke (and the reader) what particularly attracts her to Locke, rather than the book showing us.

It probably was implausible to have 16-year-old Locke be so receptive to Sabetha’s Feminism 101 lectures, but for me it was preferable to the second hand embarrassment of having Locke throw out insipid, MRA-apologist arguments for Sabetha to shoot down.

Since I’m not seeing a

Republic of Thieves

review on the horizon, I suppose I might as well give my thoughts on the book in general. Overall, I liked it, and Sabetha is a fine addition to the series’ cast.

I also kind of dug the way the main caper of the book was not a high stakes life or death game of taking on some brutal, affluent, entitled snot or other, but rather fixing an upcoming election. It shows you can have all the same drama and intrigue without putting countless lives on the line, which comes as a nice change of pace. (Granted, it turns out there are countless lives on the line in the Bondsmagi’s larger game, but that only comes up after the whole thing is over, so in my view it still counts.)

My political sensibilities being what they are, I particularly liked the election angle to the plot because the book depicts it as 1) an aristocratic exercise with no pretense of populist input (only a small fraction of the city’s residents have the franchise), and 2) a complete farce in any case, because who gets elected has f**k all to do with who’s better leadership material or has the best policies – the book dispenses with such preposterous fig leaves and dives straight into the real heart of electoral politics: naked corruption, double dealing, and general chicanery. There’s also the implication that who gets elected is ultimately trivial in terms of how Karthain is actually run, because the real ruling elite (in this case, the Bondsmagi), make damn sure that in practice, it gets run exactly the way they believe produces the greatest benefit for the city’s inhabitants. (The book seems to suggest that what they think is best for Karthain really is, which is where its views and mine diverge, but other than that, I’m completely on board with the book’s representation.)

Locke’s backstory seemed … really out of place. Given how magic has always taken such a tertiary role in the books up to that point, I didn’t expect it to play such a huge part in Locke’s past. This felt like the backstory to a character in a very different type of story, honestly. But other than that it’s just kind of, “whatever.”

#Ferretbrain #Wardog #Red Seas Under Red Skies #Scott Lynch #The Lies of Locke Lamora

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fearofaherobrine · 6 years ago

Text

Roleplay Server Log #388

"Karla’s Wings, Doc vs Insanity, Lost World Safari, Fire Practice”

[Lie] Noting that Deer stopped the rain, she heads towards Karla's house to make sure the other woman has enough hay for her horses-

[Chester] Sees her walking and scoots along behind her out of curiousity.

[Lie] Hears the multiple steps and glances behind her- Hello Chester

[Chester] Little suprised hop- Oh... I guess I'm not very good at being stealthy... - He tugs on his vest a bit in consternation.

[Lie] - Is everything alright?

[Chester] I almost got run over by a skeleton on horseback with a red scarf... other then that, no...

[Lie] - Ah, Ruby. Yes they can be a bit reckless- She greets Karla's horses as she approaches

[Ever] Is looking up with concern at the roof and doesn't notice her approach.

[Chester] It's not like I'm small and easy to miss either!

[Lie] - No, you're not. Ever? Is everything alright?

[Ever] Grimaces- With respawn on? I guess not. But I'm stilll concerned.

[Lie] - Why?- She looks up

-There's a bit of wild cackle and Karla leaps off the roof with a pair of elytra, spreading them wide and shooting out over the ground-

[Ever] Yells up - YOU BE CAREFUL DAMMIT!

[Lie] - Watch out for the ground!

[Karla] Is already heading straight out in the direction of Lie's yard-

[Ever] I just know she's gonna hurt herself! - Goes dashing after her-

[Chester] Players are so weird...

[Lie] - We should follow...

[Chester] Yes mistress!

[Lie] Follows after the other two-

[Karla] Thumps down in the garden with a spray of uprooted carrots and a big - OOF!

[Lie] - I'll grab the hoe...- Heads for the chest she keeps next to the garden

[Karla] Is dusting herself off- Whew! Zat.. I mean... THAT was fun. Ahem.

[Ever] Is red-faced and huffing in annoyance.

[Lie] - Karla, there's really no reason to hide your accent you know...

[Karla] Stiffens a little - I find it... draws the wrong kind of attention.

[Lie] - There's very few here who would have that association with that accent, it's okay to use it here

[Karla] Still looks uncomfortable and it's a bit disconcerting.

[Ever] Were you looking for us specifically Lie?

[Lie] - No actually, I was just swinging by to see if you needed any more hay for your horses- She starts re-tilling the land

[Chester] Can I help with that? - indicates the hoe-

[Karla] That's very thoughtful Lie.

[Ever] I could use a little. I'm still setting up our garden patch.

[Lie] - Sure Chester, there should be another one in the chest. And how much do you think you'll need Ever?

[Ever] Well we only have three horses...

[Karla] Is looking up again. Her thoughts are easy to read, she's looking for a higher place to jump from.

[Lie] - I'll give you six bales then, that should last you awhile

[Endrea] Passes by overhead to check on Ashe's build-

[Karla] Gives her a bit of an envious look-

[Endrea] After checking on her child lands on the roof and settles down to watch her mistress-

[Lie] Is exchanging some stuff with Ever-

[Chester] Is diligently hoeing the garden and putting it back together. He's already got a nice stack of carrots that were scattered.

[Karla] Inspects the elytra for any damage.

[Endrea] Cocks her head slightly- Mistress? I believe the Master is on fire again

[Lie] - It wouldn't surprise me, Aether finds it hilarious

[Endrea] Steps down to the ground- Especially since she's figured out how to do it herself?

[Lie] - Yup

[Karla] The child can wreathe herself in flames? That must make unexpected tantrums a bit awkward.

[Lie] - She interrupted sex...

[Karla] Children are inconvenient like that.

[Lie] - Doesn't make the frustration any less frustrating

[Endrea] Laughs a little- Trying having twelve at once

[Chester] off-handedly- Eliza said she'd had even larger broods in the past.

[Karla] Even one would be too many for me.

[Lie] - So no baby sitting duty for you, got it

[Karla] No offense meant, but my house would be dangerous for curious fingers and she'd likely come back with questions about some of the decor you would not want to answer.

[Lie] - Good point, not that she might not end up with those questions after spending some time with TLOT and Steve...

[Ever] snickers- They are certainly connoisseurs of the PDA .

[Chester] I don't blame them! Love is woooonderful!

[Lie] - Especially when you can actually do stuff...

[Chester] Sappy look- you don't have to do anything. Sometimes it's nice just to be close. - he hugs his arms to his chest, thinking of his sweet Eliza.

[Karla] I think the spider may have different tastes then you or I lie.

[Lie] - Sorry, I just... It was the first time since... Well, you helped that one time

[Karla] nods understandingly-

[Endrea] - I'm certain all you have to do is ask TLOT to watch Aether Mistress, he is warm enough for her

[Karla] Do you mind if I use your roof Lie?

[Lie] - My roof? No...

[Endrea] - What do you need the roof for?

[Karla] Leans over and the elytra fan wide - I need a high place to practice from.

[Endrea] - I can get you higher, give you more time to figure out what you need to do

[Karla] That would be appreciated-

[Ever] Looks frantic- that's a terrible idea mistress!

[Endrea] - I can catch her if she falls

[Ever] NNNNGGGHhh!

[Karla] ia already striding towards the dragon- I would be honored.

[Endrea] Crouches down to make it easier for Karla to climb on-

[Karla] Swings up easily. It's obvious she's caught up on her riding skills-

[Endrea] Spreads her wings and with a massive gale of wind launches herself up into the air-

[Karla] Hunkers down like a jockey so she isn't making drag-

[Endrea] Takes her high up- Are you ready?

[Karla] Yes! - She sits up high and grabs a back spike with both hands before flapping the elytra wide, and the sudden gust of wind onto the wings pulls her like a kite off the dragons back-

[Endrea] Twists to keep her eyes on the woman-

[Karla] Is holding wide, but angling downward as they wings lose forward momentum.

[Endrea] - Even out, you'll stay airborn longer!

[Karla] It's too loud to yell but she's trying her best-

[Endrea] Stays close in case Karla desperately needs her-

[Karla] Sees that they're rapidly heading for the ocean and tries to curve back rather then going straight-

[Endrea] Follows closely-

[Karla] Falters a little and is headed for the water again, she's not panicking, but progressively getting lower.

[Endrea] - Tilt more to one side than the other!

[Karla] Wobbles as she fights the wind-

-There's a shadow following her under the water as well-

[Endrea] Makes the decision to grab Karla, surging forwards and grabbing her within her front feet-

[Herabrine] Leaps high like a dolphin and just misses Karla's feet as Endrea snatches her higher-

[Karla] VAT ZHE FICH???

[Endrea] - Another brine, my Mistress' best friend in fact

[Karla] Is breathing heavy- Thank you....

[Herabrine] peeks out of the water to make sure all is well and does another artful leap to flash her magenta frills in the sunshine-

[Endrea] - Would you like to try again or was that enough for now?

[Karla] We can try again....

-After a long day; the night creeps slowly in. The inhabitants of the castle drift off to bed, and a gentle quiet settles over the massive artifice of cobbles and glass. Yaunfen bids their mada goodnight and heads off for their room. Deerheart shaking her head with a little smile as Doc remains alone in the lab to work on hir computer.-

[Doc] Has made some new patterns to sell and is struggling with a particularly difficult pdf file that doesn't want to upload properly.

[Idolus] Makes a curious noise from their tank.

[Doc] Yeah, yeah. Be appreciative. This stuff may be piss boring, but it keeps the lights on.

-There's a slight crackle from the command block and a hint of a laugh-

[Doc] Bored- Go away Kraz, I'm not in the mood.

[Insanity] - I believe you have the wrong person

[Doc] Shivers at the sound - You! Get off my computer.

[Insanity] - Oh come now, are we not allowed to have a... Friendly? Chat?

[Doc] You are anything but friendly.

[Insanity] - A shame considering what's lurking about here in your home

[Doc] You're about 99% lies and there are always dangers about. It's nothing new.

[Insanity] - Oh? So you already know where the Eldritch is?

[Doc] ... I don't. But I'm not sure it can be entirely killed anyway.

[Insanity] - But it can be found, and protected from

[Doc] Thumbs at the wall behind them and the hidden room beyond- Yeah, I know. I saw what Dolly did to it.

[Insanity] - She's not the only one, you seem to forget that Slender protected the mind of one of my children from it's effects

[Doc] So did Xophiel, he protected Lie, from you actually.

[Insanity] - Yes, but who else here can lead you right to it to finish it off

[Doc] Once again. You are a notorious liar. And you have zero reason to help me if you have nothing to gain.

[Insanity] - Then perhaps we should make a deal

[Doc] I already made a deal. I'm currently leaving the other creepypastas alone so Slender doesn't murder me.

[Insanity] - I will guide you to the Eldritch, if you give me back one of mine

[Doc] Get bent. I'd rather fight the tentacle monster with Dolly by my side. At least I know she won't stab me in the back. It wants Zeke. It'll come back on it's own eventually.

[Insanity] Laughs- I'm surprised you don't wish to take the initiative

[Doc] I think I'll leave looking for trouble to MB and Cp. I'm not that kind of Herobrine.

[Insanity] - So you don't desire to protect those here? Pathetic

[Doc] A little steamed- You know what? Get fucked. I'm not interested in your opinion on how I run my server. You want something from me, and I don't need your help at all.

[Insanity] - I wouldn't be so certain about that, I've been polite so far

[Doc] Small snarl- You just want the creepypastas back, and you're not getting them.

[Insanity] - I don't need your permission, I could just as easily infect you and there would be nothing you could do about it

[Doc] starting to get pissed- I think you're forgetting that LJ lives in my house now. You wouldn't even have time to inspect my mental furniture before being back out on your ass.

[Insanity] - Then perhaps something not as obvious at first, what about the little one, just freshly spawned

[Doc] Hisses and there's a crackle of static- I'll feed her the program myself. I'll make her a carrier before I'd ever let you have her. And her parents would let me do it.

[Insanity] - But you can prevent it Doctor, let me help you

[Doc] a bit loud- YES I CAN. I CAN GO OVER THERE RIGHT THE FUCK NOW.

[Insanity] Laughs again- I have infected death's child, I'll work around your program eventually

[Doc] Yeah right. I think I would have noticed that already! And have fun trying. As long as there's spark, I'll be right here to thwart you.

[Insanity] - Then why not ask your friend what her father has seen, and see the truth of my words

[Doc] Checks the time outside. - It's like 7am there. I am not doing that. She probably won't even answer the phone.

[Insanity] - Then I suppose you'll be left wondering

[Doc] firmly- I will not wonder. I will finish this upload and I will go the fuck to bed. And you will crawl back into whatever hole you came out of and get off my command block!!!

[Insanity] - Ah but I am not so easily gotten rid of this time Doctor, after all, you have two of my hosts here

[Doc] oh yes... One you considered too weak to talk too and let suffer, I'm sure she'd be thrilled to hear from you. And her son is already annoyed with your behavior. As my friend Mix says; get rekt.

[Insanity] - I never spoke to her because she was never allowed to go anywhere, there was no reason for me to speak to her then, but now? Oh the things I could whisper to her, bolden her, give her strength

[Doc] she has everything she needs already. Now you're grasping at straws. She already risked everything for her kids, I don't think she'll put them in danger now.

[Insanity] - No, she'd be protecting them

-A slight amount of white mist is forming around the base of the command block unbeknownst to Doc-

[Doc] that's your opinion. - folds hir arms in annoyance

[Insanity] - Do you really think she wouldn't do anything to protect her children?

[Doc] Yes. But going insane is not protecting them!!! It makes you a hazard to everyone you care about!

[Insanity] - You know the slender beings are not as affected by me

[Doc] Has anyone ever told you you are relentlessly annoying? I'd ask if you had something better to do, but I know doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result is the textbook definition of insanity.

[Insanity] - Then perhaps I should just return to the Wicker man, divulge what I've seen to him. He had made me quite the tempting offer after all

[Doc] see? This is why I wont deal with you. You're untrustworthy. And if you give away Mirabellas hiding place then I will tell Slender and that will likely lose you the rest of the creepypastas you claim to care so much about. Your concern will be exposed for the lie it is.

[Insanity] - I do care for my children, for you I do not. It would be so easy to just let it slip where a certain office is

[Doc] Has basically reached a point of fury where Xe's just cold and flat toned- what did the a Wicker Man offer you that's so wonderful that you'd throw everything else away so easily?

[Insanity] Something which most others would greatly envy me for and make it easier for me to gather more under my control without losing any of my power

[Doc] So more followers. Why do you even want that? Do you need them to incarnate? Tell you what, here's my offer. Ill make you a body, anything you want. You can be a giant monster and stomp on a city anytime the mood strikes you. All I ask in return is that you go hide somewhere until this is over. I'll even throw in some mobs for you to boss around if that sweetens it any.

[Insanity] - The more under my control, the more powerful they are overall. And I doubt you could make a body strong enough to contain me

[Doc] has now been insulted on a professional level- excuse me? I don't contain things. I help people BECOME things. You manage to utterly destroy yourself in a body i made ill make you a second one gratis and a way to switch between them! No charge! Just because I'm not a mad Doctor don't even act like I can't play God with the best of them!

[Insanity] - Then you'd be making them for an eternity

[Doc] I'm calling bullshit on that! You have no idea what I can do!

[Insanity] - Oh but I have seen what you can do Doctor, and I know what you can do will not be enough

[Doc] bristles! - but you won't let me try, which tells me you're bluffing and afraid you might be wrong and underestimating me!

[Insanity] - Do not test me child,I know the limits that a body can handle. I am far older than you and more experienced in what can and can't handle my energy

[Doc] Child am I??? At least I do my own dirty work instead of using other people like tools!

[Insanity] - I won't have to once Wickerman fulfills his promise

[Doc] Gets up from their chair in a rage- you'll do nothing of the kind! I'm tired of your threats. Come out here if you even can. If you're not afraid of what I'm capable of, then face me directly!

[Insanity] - Are you certain you wish that?

[Doc] Yes! I want to see your face!

[Insanity] The mist she's formed around the base of the command block suddenly darts away from it, letting the entity form a small distance away. Her appearance is as it appeared to Azrael, a young woman composed of light, making it a bit harder for the light sensitive eyes of a brine to look at- Then face me child

[Doc] Looks slightly down and then squints at her- I've been wanting to do this for a long time lady - Xe drags off one of hir heavy rubber gauntlets and slaps Insanity across the face with it. It's stingy and makes a very loud noise - NEVER INSULT MY WORK AGAIN.

[Insanity] Her voice is suddenly behind Doc- Are you sure you even hit me?- When Doc looks up she is not where she had been and seems completely unaffected by anything that had happened

[Doc] Yes I did. - They walk forward without looking back and retrieve a pair of smoked lenses from a trunk before slipping them on.

[Insanity] Giggles a little- I'm not certain you did

[Doc] Yeaaah, you're not going to make me question myself. You're not the first entity I've encountered that can make people hallucinate. - Xe pulls out a chunk of bedrock and starts molding it into what looks like two ice cream scoops attached to a pair of shears. They pull a cord out of the side of the command block and attach it to the calipers as well before darting at Insanity. Xe's far faster then lightning and pinches a tuft of the mist that makes up Insanity's form before letting go of the device. It shoots backward as the cord spins back up into the block and clip/vanishes entirely into the side of it. They glance at the screen as the computer hums into a higher drive to analyse the tiny sample before it dissolves. - I'll let you know what I find out. And we'll just see who can and can't be contained, shall we? -smug-

[Insanity] - It won't work~

[Doc] condescending - There's a phrase I've heard plenty of times. You go ahead and think that if it makes you feel more secure.

[Insanity] - I know so, you only took a small bit, and it's only a small bit that even Slender can handle

[Doc] Leans against the table - Mmmhm. -nod nod- Offender said I couldn't do anything with his saliva either.

[Insanity] Scowls-

[Doc] Smiles at her with all hir sharp teeth. - It made a very nice healing plant. Drop by Slender's greenhouse next time you visit if you want to see it.

[Insanity] Suddenly perks- Ah, I'm afraid this must be cut short, my energy is needed elsewhere

[Doc] Whatever. -makes a shooing motion- Go play. I won't have the results for a few days anyway.

[Insanity] Giggles, the sound echoing around the room as she completely vanishes-

[Doc] Mocks her giggle bitterly. - Bitch....

[Mix] -Comes to the castle with MA, they're chatting about dinos!-

[TLOT] Is sorting through the chests in the main room and packing a trunk with supplies.

[Steve] Looks resigned -

[Mix] What's going on you two?

[Ma] Looks like organization.

[Steve] More like packing for a trip...

[TLOT] Sighs- I promised to investigate something weird my Testificates discovered.

[Mix] -Plops by them- What did they find this time?

[TLOT] A plateau. It looks like a chunk error apparently. A really sheer wall of natural stone and dirt that's higher then an extreme hills biome and mostly in the clouds.

[MA] That sounds familiar. Gotta love messed up terrain.

[Mix] Can we come with? I've got nothing to do today.

[TLOT] It's fine with me.

[Steve] Shrugs- We're gonna get dirty though. It's pure wilderness.

[Mix] That sounds fine! I haven't had that kind of fun in a while. I've mostly been building.

[MA] I'll need to change clothes but then I'm down.

[Stevie] Is heading towards the castle with a slight limp-

[Steve] Do you need to borrow something MA? I've got extra clothes.

[TLOT] Is feeling extra sensitive today and picks up on Stevie. He sends him an impulse to come to where they are.

[Stevie] Doesn't even realize that's what TLOT did as he heads in that direction, soon entering the castle-

[MA] If you've got something extra I can, but it's not too much trouble to run home and grab my other set of clothes. -Turns toward the door to go do so unless Steve has some for him to wear.-

[TLOT] Looks up the stairs as he comes in- Did you need help Stevie?

[Steve] Wait, I'll get you something. - heads downstairs at a good clip-

[Stevie] - Well if you have some potions that would be nice, slipped down a small cliff...

[MA] -Spins back around and plops by Mix, Mix almost immediately leans over against him-

[TLOT] Always, that sounds a bit harrowing. - He pulls out a bottle and offers it to Stevie, it's orange and bubbly.

[Steve] Comes back up with a shirt and pants identical to his own, and a pair of leather boots. -Here you go!

[Stevie] - Thanks- He quickly chugs it, letting it heal his leg- So what's going on here?

[TLOT] A trip to my seed actually. Hoofing around in unmapped wilderness to make my Testificates happy for the most part.

[MA] Much appreciated! -Changes into the clothes. He looks odd in them, but hey, clothes are clothes!-

[Stevie] - An above ground adventure? That might be a nice change of pace

[Steve] Grins- I'm taking some kitted stuff too but who knows if it will even be needed.

[TLOT] nods- caves get stuffy after a while.

[Mix] Caves are where the Mammoths dwell.

[MA] -Nods sagely. It must be an in joke.-

[Stevie] - Mind if I come with? Alexis plans on being out hunting for at least a couple of days

[Steve] That must be a really big cave! And yeah, the more Steves the better.

[TLOT] And fusty. Mammoths smell funny.

[MA] Don't forget the other one. Redeyes be in the halls.

[Mix] We don't talk about that one. -Shakes head- And ehhh you get used to the smell after a while.

[TLOT] Well I've got what I need. I'm ready when you guys are.

[Mix] I'm good to go! -Stands back up-

[MA] Me too.

[Stevie] - I'm good

[TLOT] Leads them out of the castle and down the hill. It's a decent day and a short walk to the cave that houses the cage. He fusses around with the console a bit- I don't want to walk all the way from Kore to these gods-forsaken cooridinates.... Give me a min.

[Steve] Pokes Stevie - You're armed right? It might be needed. Wild animals and such.

[Stevie] - Of course I am, I just visited my niece and I still don't go near my brother without having a sword

-There's a bit of rustling behind the bed at the back of the cage and Traveler walks around the back of it. -

[Steve] That's a bit sad... he's gotten so much better.

[TLOT] Sees the female NOTCH and sighs heavily-

[Traveler] Took you long enough. I've been hearing rumors for far too long.

[TLOT] It's not your problem, it's mine and it's probably nothing.

[Mix] Adventure time! Not whining time.

[Stevie] At Steve- Besides, I have my powers as a back up

[Traveler] Snorts- it's everyones problem. You spend too much time here.

[TLOT] I LIVE HERE. I don't need to stress myself out being a full time nanny for everyone. They're adults and can handle themselves for the most part.

[Traveler] Whatever. Just... remember your bug spray. Ha!

[Steve] What's that supposed to mean???

[Traveler] You'll find out. - flounces out the door.

[TLOT] Small nostril flare of annoyance.

[Stevie] - So uh... Are we going?

[TLOT] Yes. - He opens a portal and stomps inside with determination.

[Steve] Helps the others through so his mate can close it again.

[Stevie] Looks around as they exit-

[MA] -Looks around too once through-

-The terrain is relatively normal around them, just a bit of forest and then a river, but beyond the water is a sheer cliff face. it's perfectly flat as if the chunk was pushed up high from underneath.

[Stevie] Spawns his pick- Sooooo, climbing?

[Mix] -Her claw gloves pop onto her arms and she looks. Excited.-

[TLOT] If I had room in my inventory for anything we might find I'd say yes, but since there isn't; we'll go the quick way.

[Stevie] - Quick way?

[Steve] Wooow...

[TLOT] Steps back and vanishes in a huge puff of bedrock fog, it billows up and up and a massive black enderdragon with eyes like stars emerges from it. - I'll just carry everyone.

[Stevie] Puts his pick away- Okay then

[Mix] Awww. -Her gloves vanish back into her inventory-

[TLOT] I'm sure there will be things to claw Mix. Just... not me please. - He hunkers down and helps them all up-

[Mix] -Pats TLOT's back once she's settled- I'd never claw you, TLOT.

[Stevie] Scrambles up and settles down-

[TLOT] Thank you.

[Steve] Takes the head and reflectively apologizes for grabbing TLOT's tiny ears-

[TLOT] mutters- every time... - He makes a powerful downsweep and they fly rapidly into the clouds above-

-The wall is so high that the air gets a bit thin before they reach the top, the brine dragon is panting as he claws onto the cliff and scrabbles over the side onto flat ground. The jungle is so thick he ends up tearing down several trees before he's secure enough to shift back.

[TLOT] Steve...?

[Steve] Is sitting on his husbands back and scrambles up so he can breathe properly-

[Stevie] - A jungle?

[Mix] -Wobbles a bit but moves to look around their surroundings-

[TLOT] As if we weren't high enough up already we have jungle trees too? They must be nearly at the build limit.

[MA] -Entirely unbothered by the thin air! What a blessing-

-The air is fuggy and hot and the ground is near invisible under a thick cover of bushes and tall grasses.

[Steve] My chest feels tight.

[TLOT] Yeah, my heads a little swimmy, it's like I'm still flying.

[Stevie] - The air is thinner

[Mix] Feels like home... -Starts swatting the grasses and bushes away near them after reequipping her claws-

[MA] We are pretty high up, it's to be expected.

[Steve] Looks around - I wonder if anyone has ever been up here before?

[Stevie] - We'll find out if we find any structures

-The swatted foliage is giving up seeds that aren't exactly the normal wheat type-

[TLOT] Well any direction is fine. Mix, now you can claw everything.

[Mix] Yeahhh! -Swatting fiesta! She's just making a general zone for them to be in right now-

[MA] -Picks up a seed- Huh... Looks.. familiar.

[Steve] Can't resist and digs down a few blocks where he's standing- Hey! Fossils! I hardly ever see those. There's a lot of them too!

[Stevie] - Want help digging them up? I've got a little space in my inventory

[TLOT] I'm concerened by the complete lack of ocelots, pigs and parrots here.

[Steve] Sure! -can't keep a Steve from digging, can you?-

[Stevie] Starts helping- It is a bit quiet...

[MA] -Scoots past Mix's happy swiping to go a bit further into the brush. He's moving plantlife aside to look for tracks or signs of life-

-The dirt is a bit churned up and there's something very large and dark just visible under the brush. -

[MA] What's this? -Starts moving stuff away from the dark spot-

-It's a curved surface, shiny and black and taller then MA at the side.-

[MA] Guys! I found something..?

[Steve] Comes up with a skull that looks uneasily familiar, not unlike the one he's wearing actually- Oh dear...

[TLOT] Steve?

-The black dome rises up on a multitude of little feet and snaps a pair of pincers at MA!-

[Stevie] - Um....

[TLOT] You guys okay over there? Don't go too far!

[MA] FUCKING HELL-- -Angrily swings his staff at it while backpedaling to get away-

[Stevie] Jumps back up to the surface as well-

-It's a giant endermite and it charges at MA, the staff bounces off it's shell. -

[MA] DIE DIE DIE DIE--- -He's just beating his staff against it in a panic-

[Mix] That's one big bug! -Jumps at the thing claws first! Swipe swipe!-

-thunk thunk thunk thunk!-

[TLOT] Is headed their way - are you trying to mine something???

[Steve] I think they need help-

[MA] TLOT THERE'S A GIANT BEETLE BUG THING OH GOD PLEASE HELP-- -thwunk thwunk- I CAN HANDLE GIANT FUCKING LIZARDS, BUT GIANT BUGS???

[Stevie] Heads for the noise-

[Mix] -Dutifully swiping at the bug while MA keeps it's attention with yelling-

[TLOT] Theres a what? HOLY SHIT.

[Steve] Can we flip it over???

[Bug] Too tough in the shell to be getting hurt, they're mainly annoying it.

[Stevie] - Maybe if I can get some ice under it?

[TLOT] If you want to try?? - He pulls out his scythe- I can probably cut it, but that's a big bug.

[MA] -He's just yelling incoherently at the thing while the end of his staff starts to spark angrily-

[Stevie] Focuses and just ends up making the ground vey slick with ice-

[Steve] Falls straight over on his butt- OW!

[Bug] Sliding around snipping at everyone with it's pincers-

[Stevie] - Sorry!

[Mix] -Takes a shot at the Bug's face when it tries to snip her-

[TLOT] Is trying to get rid of the ice now-

[Bug] Gets jabbed in the eye but keeps coming-

[Stevie] - Have you guys faced these things before?

[TLOT] Just once! And we had help then too!

[Stevie] - How did you kill it?

[Ma] -Slams his charged staff into it when it slides back toward him, a small explosion of energy from the contact sends it skidding across the icey ground- AAAAAAAAAAA

[Bug] Goes sliding into a tree and there's a loud nose like a pumpkin hitting a wall. It's really pissed now-

[Steve] We can't use fire this time, we'll burn the whole forest!

[Stevie] - What about weak spots? Is their a place we can strike where we can break through the shell?

[TLOT] The little endermites are soft underneath...

[Stevie] - So, aim for the underside then, got it- He rushes forwards to attack

[bug] PINCHING INTENSIFIES-

[MA] IT'S UNDERSIDE IS SOFT? -Flips his staff around and full force rams it under the bug before WRENCHING, and Mix helps a bit to weigh it down to flip the evil big bug of pinchy doom-

[bug] Lots of snapping and leg wiggling but it can't flip over easily-

[Steve] Stabbing time! - He goes at it with his sword, dodging the jaws and making an unholy mess-

[Stevie] Joins his fellow Steve-

[Ma] -Angrily stabs the fuck out of it too. he's angery-

[Bug] Blerg.... ded. It pops out of existence, leaving a mess of green goop everywhere and a single item drop. It's a perfect pair of elytra.

[TLOT] Is still weirdly winded because of the altitude - Good job!

[Steve] Ha!

[Ma] -Fwumps beside the goop- I... hate... bugs.

[Stevie] - Yeah, not the worst stuff I've been covered in

[Steve] Yick. But hey, free elytra. I already have a pair. Someone should take them at least.

[Stevie] - I'm really not much for flying on my own

[Ma] -Reaches over and snatches them into his inventory-

[TLOT] Well that solves that.

[Steve] I say we look for some water. I feel like Endrea sneezed on me.

[Stevie] - Agreed

[TLOT] Do you want to keep leading Mix? You seem to be good at clearing a path.

[Mix] Sure! But if another one of those things shows up, someone else can murder it! -Swipe swipe away we go!-

-The bushes are thick but they part easily under Mix's claws, it isn't long before the jungle opens up onto a large lake. The shore is barely visible on the other side and there's a bit of light, like a lone lava spawn block on the far side-

[Stevie] - Well at least we can clean up...

[Steve] Creeps up to the waters edge - I can't see the bottom... that makes me suspicious.

[TLOT] Also approaches it warily and takes a drink- Well at least it's clean...

[MA] I fear no water, I'm covered in goop, move over -Strides right to it and just. plops his leg in-

[Stevie] - Okay then

-There are fish under the water, they're really big but ignoring the people entirely-

[Steve] Is watching them closely as he washes himself off- I see you...

[TLOT] I wish I'd brought a pole... Those are big fish.

[MA] -Just, scrubbing bug guts off as best he can-

[Mix] -Washes herself off before eyeing the fish in intense thought, and then glances at her claw gloves- ...

[Stevie] Pulls his shirt off to rinse it off, his chest and back are covered in scars-

[Steve] Gets distracted by Stevie - That's... quite a collection...

[Mix] Hey TLOT, want a fish? -She's homing in on one fish-

[TLOT] I wouldn't mind haveing a closer look at least-

[Mix] -Goes full force into the water with a huge splash-

[assorted fish] WTF?

[very large fish] can't get out of the way fast enough!

[Mix] -Pops back up with one certified wiggly fish in her hands!- Tada!

[TLOT] That fish... kinda has little fin legs?

[Stevie] - That's what happens when your brother doesn't quite kill you

[Steve] Oh Stevie... You mean he'd just hurt you and leave you someplace?

[Stevie] - Sometimes, it was usually me managing to drag myself away. If I had potions they wouldn't have scarred, same with if I had died. But, at least for me, scars carry over through respawns if they are allowed to form

[Steve] Sad frown - On our seed scars are caused when someone you love hurts you...

[Mix] It's a wiggly boy! We had a different kind at home...

[Stevie] - Then you're lucky

[TLOT] That's a really weird fish.

[Steve] No... not really... - he glances at TLOT- It just means that everytime you look at that person, you know they carry a reminder of the pain you caused them.

[Stevie] - Heh, guess so- He pulls his still damp shirt on over himself and the edges start to ice over

[Coelacanth] Out of the water and not happy! Lots o wiggling!

[Steve] looking at the ice- that seems a tad uncomfortable... Do you need a different shirt?

[TLOT] Is squinting at the water and his eyes widen. His voice is super quiet but it carries, and he's standing perfectly still. - Just put it in your inventory. It'll make too much noise, and get out of the water. Calmly.

[Mix] Hmm? -Starts to do so, still clutching the wiggly boy-

[Steve] Feels his husbands fear and moves to obey. He goes to pull Stevie and squeaks as the icy shirt touches his hand-

- there are a few ripples on the water, getting closer-

[MA] -Not in the water-

[Steve] manages to drag Stevie to shore and looks back.

- there's a glimpse of something like an up turned boat floating on the surface, and then it's gone again-

[TLOT] I don't like that... It reminds me of something... I only remember that it was bad...

[Stevie] - At least it's not Basil?

[Steve] is focused on his mate as the Herobrine latches onto a scrap of memory. [TLOT] This isn't right... There should be a castle... Just a small one... Like tower, covered in mossy cobbles....

- There's a sudden churn in the water and a bit of blood floats up like a slick from below-

[Stevie] - That's not good..

[TLOT] We'll have to walk around the water. I don't know what's out there, but it's obviously dangerous.

[Stevie] - What about over the water?

[Mix] -Puts the wiggly fish buddy into her inventory before shaking off the water she's soaked with-

[TLOT] Takes a bit of a wheezy breath- no... No more flying right now. Just stay away from the shore.

[Stevie] - But I could probably just freeze us a path?

[TLOT] And risk it not being wide enough? Or getting broken from underneath? I think not.

[Steve] I nudges Stevie, shaking his head no ever so slightly.

[MA] Better to be safe than sorry.

[TLOT] Is already walking, keeping one eye on the water-

[Stevie] Follows along, his sword slipping easily into his hand-

[Steve] Forges a little ahead- hey there's a little path here. It's pretty rough but the ground is partly clear-

[Mix] Good. As much as I love slicing the grass down, a premade path is great.

- the ground is tromped down but it doesn't look like a deliberate path, and the trees are broken high above it -

[Mix] -Looking up at the broken trees with MA as they get there-

[MA] -Slowly turns to study the trees before frowning.- Hm...

[TLOT] I still feel like we should keep the water in sight...

[Steve] someone really went to town with a shovel here. There's flattened dirt blocks everywhere...

[Stevie] - I'm not sure that was done by shovels...

[MA] -Pursed lips- … It leads TO the water.

[Stevie] - Like the trails left by wolves...

[Steve] I hear a rumbling, is that thunder?

-There's a bit of a rumble and the trees shiver slightly-

[TLOT] Looks around nervously-

[Steve] Hard to see much of anything under all these trees... - the noise is getting louder and there's a certain rhythm to it-

[TLOT] let's get on the opposite side of the trail at least, hide in the bushes. That's a really heavy thump...

- They can hear the sound of branches breaking too-

[Steve] Helps hurry the others into a more hidden spot.

[Stevie] - That is definitely not thunder...

- A speckled shape breaks into view, it's absolutely massive, with legs thicker then tree trunks and a neck arching up and up far into the foliage above. It's feet are shaking the ground with every step, and it's thick tail is bending trees like saplings as it makes its way towards the water.

[Steve] pure terror-

[TLOT] urgent whisper- Is it a dragon???

[Mix and MA] A hightop! -hushed but excited-

[MA] I had a feeling it was one, to break the trees all the way to the top? Very little could do that.

[Mix] I remember the hightop in Cape Claw!

[Stevie] -... I'd like to go home now

[TLOT] What the nether does something that big even eat????

[Mix] Leaves!

[MA] Lots, and lots of leaves.

[Stevie] - Yeah but that thing could trample us to death!

[Steve] Just... just leaves?

[Hightop] Makes it's way to the water and looks around cautiously before craning it's long, long neck down to drink.

[TLOT] It's... it's weirdly graceful. Like a big smooth dragon.

[Stevie] - It's also terrifying!

[Steve] I almost want to touch it.

[TLOT] I request that you don't do that.

[Hightop] Wanders down the shore a bit and there's the sound of munching very high up -

[Mix] If we find one that can talk, I can ask for you, Steve. They're not the brightest but they're usually friendly.

[Stevie] - They can talk?

[Mix] On my seed, yes.

[TLOT] I'm not holding out hope that that's the case here... mentally I'm not getting much.

[Mix] Well if we do find one, I'll ask for ya, Steve.

[Steve] Thank you.

[TLOT] We should keep moving. I shudder to think what comes out at night here.

[Stevie] - Agreed, so what exactly are we looking for?

[TLOT] Well I really wanted was to check on the chunk flora and fauna to see if it was abnormal and that's a big fat yes. But we should at least walk until dark and see if there are any structures. If not, we can go back. Some of this just feels weirdly familiar to me.

[Stevie] - Then let's go

-As they skirt the shoreline, the ripples seem to follow them. Presumably the hightop is too big to be prey, but the small humans are not so lucky. The air is muggy and seems to get hotter as they travel, TLOT's breathing is slightly labored and he's struggling to conceal it.

[Stevie] Is nervous and leaving a small trail of ice behind him-

[Mix] -Is listening carefully to things in the forest as they go. As far as dinosaurs are considered, she's got little fear-

[Steve] Is clearing brush with a shovel and hits something hard - Hey I found a moss cobble. - he starts swatting at a thick clump of bramble blocks-

[TLOT] Feels around mentally - I... I don't feel so good...

[Stevie] - Do we need to throw up a quick shelter?

[TLOT] It's the ground... this area feels... I'm not even sure... I feel like I ate mushrooms.

[Steve] You sit, I'll search. Stevie? Please help me.

[MA] -Helps clear the ground so they can see more cobble.-

[Mix] Take a breather, TLOT. Don't need you passing out.

[Stevie] - Yeah, can do- He starts helping to clear

-The clearing reveals a bit more wall, and floor, there was something here, but the walls have all fallen. Or with Hightops around, perhaps been kicked over.

[Steve] Is searching for any sign of a basement with no luck so far.

[MA] -Continues swatting along until he finds the edges of the now decrepit building-

[Stevie] - Should we dig down?

[Steve] If you want? But it seems solid enough...

[Stevie] - Well then what do you suggest?

[Steve] Clear out around the walls, look for nooks.

[TLOT] Coughs a bit-

[Stevie] - Got it

[Mix] -Staying by TLOT to keep him company-

[MA] -As he's swatting along he gets his staff caught in a nook in the wall.- Hmm? What's this? -He bends down to check and finds a trunk in the nook.- I.. found a trunk.

[Steve] rushes over- open it!

[Stevie] Keeps an eye on their surroundings-

[MA] -Pops the trunk open with his staff, since it's there anyway.-

-Inside is a tablet, a lot of very old fossil bones, and something white. It has no glow, or definition. It just looks like a mistake. A small featureless white cube.

[MA] -Pulls all the things out- H...uh.

[TLOT] Looks at the cube and staggers back before vomiting.

[Steve] Races to help him-

[Stevie] - TLOT!?

[Mix] Woah!-- Cover that up MA!

[MA] -Just cram the cube into your inventory, just do it. What could go wrong.-

[TLOT] Seems to calm down as it's out of his sight. But he still looks very ill.

[Mix] Is that better now TLOT?

[TLOT] Gasps- We need to leave...

[MA] I'll just.. put all of this in my inventory if we've gotta go now! -Starts doing that!-

[Stevie] - So how do we get down?

[Steve] I don't know, but we need to get him away from here!

[TLOT] Looks rather dazed.

[Stevie] Looks around- I don't think we're terribly far from the edge of the chunk...

[Mix] Less talking, more walking! -Helps TLOT to start stepping away from the old build-

[TLOT] Just allows himself to be half-dragged as Steve runs along behind-

[Stevie] Runs ahead until he reaches the edge of the cliff, looking around- I'm guessing TLOT turning into a dragon again is out of the question...

[Steve] I've got some junk blocks, we could lay stairs?

[Stevie] - I don't think any of us have enough for that...- There's a bit of ice creeping over the edge of the block

-There's some animal-sounding noises from inside the jungle, and the sky is quickly growing rosy as the sun heads for the horizion-

[Stevie] Jumps a bit in surprise and accidentally takes a step back off of the edge, his powers surging and creating a slick block under him- WHOA!

[Steve] Reaches out to help him - Stevie!

[Stevie] Is grabbed and looks down- I think I might have an idea? But I don't know how well I can pull it off

[Steve] I'm game, what are you thinking?

[Stevie] - Sliding down?

[MA] I'll help if I can.

[Steve] That could work. I think you better do it fast though...

[Stevie] Takes a breath and focuses, the ice spreading from the initial block and traveling downwards, hugging the sides of the chunk- Should we go as it's being made?

[MA] Probably, incase they start breaking.

[Stevie] - Guess I go first...- He sits down and pushes off, picking up speed as he travels down

[Steve] Basically grabs his husband against his back and TLOT clings to him a bit desperately. He waits for the others to hit the slide and goes down after them-

[Stevie] Yelps as their speed increases, not used to dealing with these sorts of physics he almost launches them off the side a few times as they speed for the bottom. He maintains his focus and manages to keep creating the massive ice slide-

[Mix] Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

[Steve] Does some recreational screaming-

[Stevie] After several minutes slides ass first into the dirt, having the wind knocked out of him in the process as they reach the ground-

[MA] -Vague disgruntled noises as he slides with them-

[Steve] tumbles onto the grass as well, TLOT loses his grip on Steve and rolls a bit farther-

[TLOT] Is already breathing better and his color is returning as he lays against the normal green grass.

[Steve] Realizes the mobs are starting to emerge and draws his sword-

[Stevie] Catches his breath as he makes himself stand and summons his sword-

[Mix] -Hops daintily off the ice slide and goes straight for the nearest mob, claws first!- Weee!

[Stevie] Slices through several mobs with a far too practiced ease-

[TLOT] Is coming around and lifts himself up on his hands, he's shaking his head in confusion-

[Steve] Actually apologizes as he cuts down a zombie-

[Stevie] - TLOT! You doing better now?

[TLOT] Why am I all wet???

[Stevie] - I kinda made an ice slide?

[TLOT] A what?

[Steve] We need a portal please!

[Stevie] - Explanation later!

[TLOT] I'm on it- He starts conjuring, it's obviously taking some effort, but the hole does open-

[Steve] Backing towards it- Abandon seed!

[Stevie] Runs through-

[MA] -Stops Mix from slicing some poor zombie in half to pull her through the portal-

-The offensive pod above stirs as the group comes back through and watches them carefully as they pass-

[TLOT] I can't tell you the last time I felt that sick...

[Stevie] - Can we not go back there again?

[TLOT] I'm good with that. I did what was expected of me. I'll tell my followers they're not permitted to go there either.

[MA] Hey tlot

[TLOT] Very tired sounding- yes?

[MA] do you want the tablet i grabbed with the rest or?

[TLOT] Just stick it someplace please... we'll have a look at it at least.

[Steve] There's a little wall around the bed..

[Stevie] - I'm going to head back up if nobody minds

[MA] - looks for a clear spot to place the tablet before doing so -

-The image is of two figures. One is clearly a NOTCH, the other has the face of a wolf, or perhaps a wolf mask? Both are extending one hand towards each other to grasp a small object between them. It looks like a tiny golden sun. Their opposing hands are behind their backs and each is concealing a knife. -

[TLOT] ...

[Stevie] - What are they doing?

[Steve] Something that happened a long time ago I hope.

[TLOT] Plotting a betrayal, judging by the knives.

[Stevie] - Well at least your NOTCH is gone

[Mix] Yeah, at least you have that much, TLOT.

[TLOT] Just... leave it there. I need to think about this... my head is killing me...

[Stevie] - We could go to the bar? It's not too far

[Doc] Is heading over to visit Lie with Yaunfen and Waffles. [Both the cat and the food.]

-There's fwooshing noises coming from the back steps by the workroom and infectious laughter-

[Yaunfen] That's a weird noise....

[Doc] Weirdly familiar.

[CP] Around back briefly setting himself on fire over and over again to entertain his daughter who is in Lie's lap-

[Doc] Oh my goodness!

[Yaunfen] Erupts in giggles-

[CP] Freezes as he realizes they've been spotted- The fuck are you doing here?

[Lie] - Hey Doc

[Yaunfen] We brought you food. -flourishes a half trunk-

[Doc] Just came over to visit and Yaunfen had the idea to bring you breakfast.

[Lie] - Well thank you Yaunfen, that was very thoughtful of you

[CP] Takes Aether from Lie-

[Yaunfen] Hands her the trunk once her hands are free and there's a whiff of bacon and syrupy smells from it. -

[Doc] Is just smiling at Cp-

[Aether] Makes baby nonsense and puts her sleeve in her mouth-

[CP] - Stop that, Lie? Do you have her pacifier?

[Lie] - No, I think it's in the bedroom...

[Yaunfen] I'll get it! - rushes into the house-

[Doc] Smiles after then as well, hir feelings are plain. Xe's proud of hir child and very happy with Cp right now too.

[Waffles] Snuffles around Lie's feet a little and does a whisker tickle on her hands-

[Lie] - Hey Waffles, you behaving?

[Waffles] Mow?

[Doc] Chuckles - they're just hoping for a handout. Cats are cats, even big cakey ones. Yaunfen is having better luck getting them to behave then Fru at least.

[Lie] - Well, Fru is a Trex…

[Aether] Is making her newly learned "concentrating" face

[Doc]Uh-oh Cp... that looks like an 'I'm about to be stinky' face. Fart or otherwise.

[CP] - No it's not

[Aether] Combusts-

[Doc] Okay, firey, not stinky. She was certainly doing something deliberate though. And yeah... Fru is going to be an issue. I have a feeling I may be stuck with fighting them to submission after their last growth spurt happens. Scarab or no...

[Yaunfen] Comes back with the soft giraffe. - Will this work?

[Doc] Gives it a suspicious look-

[Lie] - Yeah, Sophie will work just fine- She takes the toy and hands it to her daughter who starts chewing on it- So any new news from your end of the seed Doc?

[Doc] TLOT apparently had a very worrying experience. His Testificates found several chunks of pushed up plateau that's full of oversized monsters.

[Lie] - Oh dear, is everyone okay?

[Doc] Shaken up, and Stevie apparently learned a new way to use his glitch.

[CP] - What did he do?

[Yaunfen] He made a big slide out of ice and they zoomed down! - Is gesturing with their hands like Steve did when telling them about it.

[Lie] - Oh wow! That's impressive!

[CP] Groans-

[Aether] Flickers out-

[Doc] It saved their butts. They found something bad, but I haven't had a chance to examine it myself. MA has it last I heard.

[Yaunfen] The baby went out.

[CP] - Yeah she can't really hold her flames for long yet

[Lie] - Well hopefully we figure out what they found soon. Do you know what it was that they found?

[Yaunfen] Aww it's okay Aether. You'll be able to blaze it just like daddy someday.

[Doc] Some kind of tiny white cube that made TLOT so weak and sick that he threw up.

[Lie] - Could it be something his NOTCH had made?

[Aether] Babbles-

[Doc] Maybe. I'll get my hands on it eventually. Though there's the chance that it makes brines sick in general, not just him.

[Yaunfen] Babbles back and makes some funny faces for Aether.

[Lie] - Guess we'll find out eventually

[CP] Watches as Aether's face screws up- There's the poopy face

[Doc] Someones burning through the diapers huh?

[CP] - Yeah yeah- He stands up and takes Aether inside to change her

[Yaunfen] Someone's being a good daddy.

[Doc] Scoots over to Lie - and you didn't even have to ask. - They give her a small hug- How's motherhood suiting you?

[Lie] - Other than the baby finding the worst ways to shut down sex? Good

[Doc] Yeah.... that part is rough...

[Yaunfen] Did I do that?

[Doc] Sometimes, but it was okay. You wanted to sleep in the bed with me and Deerheart. And we understood that was where you needed to be.

[Lie] - I just, really need some, but if Aether is with somebody else for too long then she gets really fussy because she gets cold and I'm pretty sure other than daddy, well TLOT's probably the only one hot enough

[Doc] Well... I know it annoys Cp, but I could always use my touch on you...?

[Lie] - No, I want my husband

[Yaunfen] Isn't Gk hot enough?

[Doc] Waves hir hands in a placating manner- Just offering!

[Lie] - Maybe...

[CP] Comes back out with Aether- All clean now

[Doc] Good job.

[Yaunfen] Can I hold her? Or will she flame on me?

[Lie] - She's still pretty young Yaunfen...

[Yaunfen] Oh... okay. Can she have candy yet?

[Doc] I think that's a no too...

[Lie] - No Yaunfen. It will be a long time before she can have that

[Yaunfen] Oh well...

[Doc] Human babies don't mature like dragons kiddo. They don't pop out ready to run.

[CP] - They grow up a bit more slowly

[Yaunfen] petting Waffles-

[Doc] It's okay, you'll have plenty of chances to play with her later. I think once she gets on her feet she'll be a real handful. How's Cn handling it?

[Lie] - Alright, but he's spending more time with Firebird since our visit to the other server

[Doc] Firebird is a decent teacher, so that's probably for the best.

[Blake] Comes out of the house and bristles at the sight of the big cat so near to the baby-

[Lie] - So what are your plans for the day Doc?

[CP] Bounces Aether a little to keep her happy-

[Doc] There's a small update I need to do on the server. It's going to suck because it's a physics bug fix and I'm afriad it's going to mess up some of the builds.

[Lie] - Do you want me to text Dofta and see if she can get you a clean copy?

[Doc] I was considering it.

[Blake] Growls at Waffles-

[Waffles] Very bored and droll cat look-

[Lie] - Here, I'll send her a text- She pulls out her phone and fires off a quick message

[Dofta] Texting back- It's really late.... do you need it now?

[Lie] Looks at Doc- Do you need it now? She says it's late there

[Doc] I guess I can find something else to do for a bit...

[Lie] Texts back- It can wait till morning

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rosycheeked · 3 years ago

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first line meme (published fics)

Rules: List the first lines of your last 20 published stories. (If you have less than 20, just list them all!) See if there are any patterns. Choose your favorite opening line. Tag some people to play the next round!

tagged by @jake-amy!! I haven’t been tagged in a game like this since like. maybe 2013?? so this is wild for me!!!! thanks so much!!

I have 38 published fic over five different fandoms and idk if that’s a good thing? if anyone wants to know, I’ve published a total of 353,637 words on ao3 and idek how many words I published on lj lol some of these will be two sentences, but the second part is a completion of the first and I think both are necessary! okay here we go, going in reverse order:

20. A year passes and Clarke opens the closet door and is almost surprised when one of the trash bags falls from a high shelf on top of her. darling, we outshone the stars bellarke

19. Jinki grows up with dreamscapes in his back pocket and a blaster in his right hand. you knew you’d know me onho/shinee

18. Monty hasn’t spoken for days. scatter what remains minty

17. Miller is walking across campus, earbuds in place and matching his stride with beat, when someone grabs his arm. kisses on my knuckles minty

16. Her first memory is at five. trust me harper/monty friendship

15. “Oh my god,” Clarke says, bending down to pull the lasagne out of the oven. lasagne bellarke (connected to a winter vacation)

14. The car is packed, and they’re waiting on Clarke. a winter vacation bellarke (connected to lasgane)

13. A list of chores lies on Bellamy’s bedside table, a small, crudely crafted piece of furniture. everything comes undone bellarke

12. See, Monty might be younger, but that doesn’t make him different in any way. to live in our world, thoroughly bellamy + wells + monty brofic

11. It’s seven-thirty am. a better way home minty (sequel for to live in our world)

10. “I’m not cut out for love or romance,” Hawke says mournfully into her mug. now I’m found again vhawke

9. To say she loves Kirkwall is a lie, Hawke thinks. She knows that to say she loves anything is a stretch. go forward slowly vhawke

8. “Adaar makes horrible first impressions,” Varric tells her, “so don’t take it to heart. She’ll like you, trust me.” please picture me vhawke

7. “Yeah, I’ll have the number three, the fourteen, um, one of the twenty-one, and, you know what, can you make that two orders of the number three, and then…” Kate scans the menu in her mind. how shall I correct it? kathony

6. Snow gently falls outside, and every so often tree branches scrape against the windows. things take the time they take kathony

5. The sun is shining and the water is calm; what’s meant to be a beautiful Sunday the week before the Fastnet Race has quickly turned around. there be fury on the waves kathony

4. “You know, he was not always like this.” a tear of tremulous emotion kathony

3. Trouble in paradise comes after three months. ocean solitudes are blest kathony (sequel for fury on the waves)

2. The library is the quietest room at Aubrey Hall. sigh a sigh kathony

1. There must be a mistake. half afraid to hope kathony

out of all of these, just here, my fav is actually 9, for go forward slowly, because like, the theme was very much about how a home is made, and how you might not love that home but it can still be your home, even after trauma. I just think I started out really strongly!! and followed through on the themes I wanted to! I don’t particularly see any patterns, but if someone sees one, please lmk!!

to anyone reading this, genuinely, please feel free to consider yourself tagged. I’m persistently dumb and can never think of people when on the spot, so please do this if you want to!!!

#tag games #this was interesting #just seeing some of my old writing!#20. I published in 2014 asldfjaklsj oh man oh man #am i old #my other fav opening line is in an older fic than what's listed here #my oldest fic was published 2013

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swerdnase · 7 years ago

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on variations of the diagonal palm shift

Here are some other variations of the diagonal palm shift. Right Hand Steal

The Jinx, Issue 40, 1938, p. 264 / Tom Bowyer Tom Bowyer was one of the first to put a variation of the DPS into print in The Jinx as ‘Indetectable’. Despite being listed as an improvement, the move itself remains rather crude, using an exaggerated diagonal jog via Erdnase to set the card into position for a right handed classic palm. The card is then stolen in a similar action to the side steal.

Larry Jennings on Card & Coin Handling, 1977, p. 22 / Larry Jennings Larry Jennings published a variant steal in 1977 under LJ Angle Steal that involved using the DPS set up to steal the card into a right modified Tenkai palm or gambler’s palm. After the card is jogged and pulled back, the card is caught between the right thumb and right palm and maneuvered out of the pack. The card lies more forward than a tenkai palm with the outer right corner ending up around the palmer side of the fourth MCP joint. The position is similar to Marlo’s Angle Palm position (The Tabled Palm, 1957, p. 6) or Gene Maze’s Unit Grip (Packet Switches Part Four, 1977, p. 263)

The Vernon Chronicles Vol 1, 1987, p. 65 / Arthur Finley A more refined right-handed steal from the DPS was described by Stephen Minch in the first Vernon Chronicles. After the card is diagonally jogged, the selection is moved leftward by the actions of the right thumb and left fourth finger under the cover of the right hand. The card is then stolen into right classic palm as the right hand continues its movement left to pull up the left sleeve. A clarification appeared in volume 3 of the Vernon Chronicles (1989, p. 15) and a right steal into gambler’s flat palm is also noted to be Vernon’s preference. Technical Variations

The Card Magic of LePaul, 1949, p. 61 / Paul LePaul In The Card Magic of LePaul, a technique is described for a left handed steal. While not directly related, the technique has been championed by many as an alternative to the DPS. Briefly: the right fingers straddle the outer left corner of the protruding card, which is the significantly displaced clockwise into left hand palm as it is apparently pushed in the deck. There are however a few drawbacks to this technique: the unnatural placement and squaring actions of the right fingers, and the need for the right hand to change grips during the steal.

Side Steal, 1957, p 45 / Ed Marlo Ed Marlo published a variation in lieu of the DPS in Side Steal coined ‘The Diagonal Steal’. Similar to LePaul technique, it uses the right second finger on the outer left corner of the card to achieve a similar clockwise rotation of the selection into left palm. The movement of the right fingers is less obvious and the right hand retains its grip using Marlo’s ‘Pinch’ technique.

Complete Works of Derek Dingle, 1982, p. 105 & 172 / Derek Dingle In Complete Works, Richard Kaufman describes a technique of Derek Dingle’s to steal a peeked card into the left hand. While labelled as the “Peek Twist DPS”, it is more aptly described as a side steal. The move retains neither the diagonal jog nor the rotational action used for the steal. Instead, a peeked card is side-jogged via the classic side steal action and then the entire deck is rotated moving the protruding card into palm position. Also of note is a technique published in the same volume under “Technical Refinement of LJ’s Angle Palm Steal” that uses the left thumb to eliminate the action of the right forefinger. Note that this is similar to Vernon’s technique in Revelations (1984).

Zarrow: A Lifetime of Magic, 2008, p. 347 / Herb Zarrow Most of Zarrow’s work outside of his eponymous shuffle remains largely unknown. In David Ben’s gargantuan tome, his variation of the DPS is recorded. In summary, instead of raising the deck to the fingertips, the shift is performed with the deck held in mechanic’s grip. The fork of the left thumb or the interphalangeal joint is used to catch the right outer corner of the selection and bring it backwards to initiate the steal.

MagicCon 2010, 2010, p. 8 / Derek Delgaudio Borrowing similar mechanics from Jacob Daley, Derek Delgaudio published an idea in his MagicCon lecture notes where the DPS can be performed from peek with a deck wrapped in an elastic band with no variation in technique. Multiple Card Handling

Jack McMillen, 2011, p. 252 / Paul Chosse Doing the DPS with multiple cards poses numerous issues, one of which being that the cards do not remain in alignment throughout the rotation into palm. Charlie Miller used to pose this as a challenge to young magicians. A solution of Paul Chosse’s was posted years ago on the Magic Café and subsequently published in Jack McMillen. Briefly: combining the actions of the Erdnase bottom palm, method one, with the DPS, after the cards and jogged and begin their rotation, when the cards are parallel with the deck, the right fourth finger slides along the right long edge of the deck and pushes the cards backwards, lessening the degree of rotation required for the palm.

Card Men, 2014, p. 60 / Ricky Smith Taking a different approach, Ricky Smith publishes his variation in Dan and Dave’s Card Men. Without disclosing his technique, the cards are simply displaced during the selection process and stolen together as a block. Covers

The Lost Tapes Vol. 2, 1984 / Earl Nelson In Earl Nelson’s technical study of the DPS, he includes an all-around-square-up after the steal as a covering action for the DPS.

Jack McMillen, 2011, p. 252 / Paul Chosse One of Paul Chosse’s covers for the DPS was published in Jack McMillen in 2011. The technique is described in an earlier post, but briefly: after the steal, the deck is given an all-around-square-up. As the former inner end of the pack is rotated to the ceiling, the right thumb riffles the ends to bring attention to the deck and away from the dirty hand.

Ricky Smith on the Diagonal Palm Shift, 2015 / Dorian Rhodell In Ricky Smith’s video tutorial on the DPS, he includes an exceedingly clever cover of Dorian Rhodell’s that uses a pen to keep the dirty hand in motion.

#diagonalpalmshift #erdnase #cardmagic #moves

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wyrdsistersofthedas · 7 years ago

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Taint Resistance in a Bottle - Random Thought Blogs: The Blighted Entries 2

Totally just a random exercise in speculation this week after reading some very interesting ideas about whether the taint could be spread from Grey Wardens to their LIs or to those healing them. I highly recommend reading the excellent thoughts and evidence presented by the OP, @altalemur , @rederiswrites and @higheverrains. My thoughts took a tangent, of course, that eventually circled back to become this post.

I think there is a fairly simple, albeit probably magical, answer to the question. Whatever gives the Grey Wardens their resistance to the taint makes it nigh impossible for them to pass the taint on to others. Even with prolonged exposure to a warden’s body, like during a rare warden pregnancy, the warden is not contagious, including to the child. In fact, we know that Morrigan had to go to extreme, probably blood magicky, means to have a baby with the taint. Wardens just don’t pass it on. Examples:

If Morrigan is involved with a male warden who refuses to do the Dark Ritual, she still gets pregnant with a taint-free Kieran (which implies there must be some consent on the part of the warden in order for the ritual to work).

Side note: The fact that Morrigan could have a baby with the warden without the Dark Ritual implies that the ritual had nothing to do with increasing her fertility. The ritual was purely to pass the taint on to their child or create a connection with the archdemon. Ergo, Morrigan probably was using other means (again likely magical) to ensure she became pregnant.

Fiona gives birth to Alistair, taint free.

Side note: Fiona had been a warden for about a year when she became pregnant. Same thing happens with Morrigan, if you do the Dark Ritual or the warden is romantically involved with her. This suggests that a warden’s best chance at having children is during a 18-24 months window right after the Joining.

When griffons were forced to undergo a modified Joining ritual, they are completely unable to develop the Grey Wardens’ resistance to the taint. This leads to their (near) extinction because they can infect each other with the taint, unlike wardens.

I suspect that when the first Grey Wardens discovered how to do the Joining, they also figured out a way to magically block, or resist, the taint...at least for a while. If this theory is true, it would also give another reason for the Calling. If the Grey Wardens eventually lose all their resistance they would become no different than a ghoul, who can and do spread the taint to others.

“There are stories across Ferelden of these ghouls, maddened by the corruption of the blight, attacking their friends and spreading the corruption further. While it is likely that the sickness will eventually kill a ghoul, the dying strength of these poor creatures makes them nearly as great a danger as the darkspawn themselves.

They are no longer our friends, our family, or our countrymen. They are victims of the Blight, and must be given the same mercy Hessarian showed Andraste: a swift sword.”

It stands to reason that Grey Wardens who completely lose their resistance would then pass on the taint like other infected beings. (I wonder if the Architect’s accelerated ghoul program, which he used on Bregan, Genevieve, and Utha, allowed them to keep their resistance longer. Utha seemed pretty lucid in Awakening. I wonder if the Architect gave Seranni some form of the resistance too.)

A warden’s resistance to the taint is so powerful, in fact, that it literally blocks the song of the old gods in darkspawn. The Architect needed the blood of wardens to free the darkspawn of their compulsion, or rather their resistance to the taint.

youtube

So yeah, that resistance that Grey Wardens have to the taint is probably what prevents them from spreading it to their companions. Now the next question should be...what gives Grey Wardens that resistance? Like I said before, I think part of the resistance is part of the magic of the Joining Ritual, but that doesn’t explain why some can survive the Joining and other die. What makes a Grey Warden able to survive the Joining and develop that resistance to the taint? Is it some innate quality or biologic feature in the warden themselves? Or is it an outside force or aid?

Leliana seems to have a natural resistance to the taint. Maric is able to resist via potions concocted from “rare herbs” and, possibly, his dragon flavored blood. There are also suggestions that a person’s willpower can affect their level of resistance. Former lead writer and ex “word of god”, David Gaider, said:

“Insofar as how long a Grey Warden could remain on the throne, it depends. The taint will make a Grey Warden age faster, so someone like Loghain isn't going to be able to stay a Grey Warden for very long as he's no young man. The "thirty years" quote is about the maximum, but the reality is that it depends on how often one is exposed to the corruption and sometimes just personal variance-- even so, for a monarch to stay on the throne upwards of thirty years is no mean feat. I don't really think that's the limiting factor when it comes to this sort of thing.” (Bioware Forums, I miss your information if not the sea of negativity. More interesting taint related info here.)

Another quote:

“But the idea is also that it varies. Thirty years is the maximum that you could probably expect. It's going to vary for an individual according to their willpower and the level of their interaction with the darkspawn. During a Blight you can expect that the Grey Wardens are going to have shorter lifespans. Outside of a Blight the Grey Wardens would tend to live longer. We have instances in the game of people going on their Calling after five or ten years. Alistair's thirty year quote shouldn't be taken as gospel, that's the way I like it.” (Interview with Gaider, posted on Swooping is Bad LJ)

I’m going to have to investigate this further, but I am pretty sure the level of resistance in each warden varies and can be affected by several factors.

Taint Resistance in a Bottle?

“King Maric was given a leather satchel full of potions, each of them contained in a delicate glass vial. According to the First Enchanter, this was a precious mixture of herbs that would enable Maric to resist the disease spread by the darkspawn. He was, after all, the only one in the group without the Grey Warden’s immunity. One full vial was to be swallowed each morning; according to Duncan’s count, that meant the King had a two-week supply.

Rather optimistic of the First Enchanter, really.” (The Calling, p. 71)

I’m very curious about the “rare herbs” mentions in The Calling and in the Joining ritual description. I suspect that Marethari used a variation of the potion Maric took to keep Mahariel alive long enough to take the Joining. The fact that none of our companions were tainted while killing the oodles of darkspawn in Origins would make a lot more sense if we had to make potions to help them keep their resistance up. And here is the section of total speculation that began this whole post:

What could those “rare” herbs be? (Possible ingredients list lies below the cut.)

(I mean, this could be critical information for those of us that like to write fanfiction and don’t want to totally hand wave encounters with the darkspawn by saying, “Once again, we’ve all managed to not get tainted in spite of all the people around us who are totally tainted now because darkspawn!”)

The Wilds Flower: (rare-ish) Given that it these flowers can help a mabari suffering from the taint, it stands to reason it can help a human build their resistance. This flower would be available to the Dalish and was known to the kennel master at Ostagar, so it would very likely be included in the tincture. It can be found in the swamps of the Korcari Wilds.

Embrium: (common) This flower is often used in healing mists and potions, and to enhance regeneration. Sounds like qualities that could help combat the taint. It is commonly found in the regions around the Waking Sea.

Spindleweed: (common) A common ingredient in resistance potions, it stands to reason that a taint blocker would include this herb. It can be found in the valleys on either side of the Frostback Mountains.

Dragonthorn: (rare-ish) The leaves of the dragonthorn tree “enhance and stabilize other, more volatile magical compounds”, a helpful trait for a potion that combats one of the most virulent diseases in Thedas. It also is used in spirit resistance tonics. It can be found in the Forbidden Oasis and the Wellspring, but sample could theoretically be obtained from one of the Circles of Magi, the Wonders of Thedas or other merchants of medicinal/magical ingredients.

Vandal Aria: (common) Cousin of the Silent Plains rose, this plant can be used to craft healing potions and a rock armor tonic. This plant can grows in dry climates, like the Western Approach and the Hissing Wastes, but can be purchased from most medicinal merchants.

Deep Mushroom: (common) The right varieties of deep mushroom can restore stamina and help heal injuries. “The most common varieties used in the herbalist's trade are the Blightcap, Ghoul's Mushroom, and Brimstone Mushroom, almost all of which tend to carry the darkspawn's corruption. While they cannot transmit the disease, this trait often makes them quite poisonous.” Clearly, deep mushrooms are taint resistant themselves, but choosing the right variety and careful preparation would be needed in order to harness their beneficial properties and avoid accidental poisonings. Various varieties of deep mushrooms can be found in caves and in the Deep Roads.

Concentrator Agent: (common) Composed of distilled and purified Heatherum and Foxite, which are both common herbs in Ferelden, a concentrator agent would enhance the effects of a taint resisting potion.

Lifestone: (rare) Although lifestone is a rock, not an herb, it would a powerful ingredient to add to a taint repelling recipe. It can only be found in proximity to lyrium veins in the Deep Roads and likely was affected by it. “Lifestones enhance the natural properties of other materials used in item creation.”

Felicidus Aria: (near extinction, extremely rare) “Commonly known as the Silent Plains Rose” this flower is the only plant that can grow in Blighted lands. This implies that it has an extreme natural resistance to the taint. It would be nearly impossible to find and extraordinarily expensive, but it could be a powerful component in an taint eliminating elixir. Hawke has some (if you do Isabela’s quest). It could also be stolen from very rich nobles.

High Dragon Blood [living preferred]: (Rare. Super rare if the dragon was still alive! Damn near one of a kind, if the dragon was a great dragon. Be prepared for weird grand kids with that last one though! ;-} ) Dragons are, perhaps, the most naturally taint resistant creatures in Thedas and their blood might convey some of their power. Known side effects: Reaver-itis and scaly skin if too much is consumed. You might have to make friends with a dragon worshiping cult to get the blood of a living dragon, btw.

Magic also seems to be necessary in the alchemic process to create taint resistance tonics, so a knowledgeable mage healer would likely be required to make the concoction work. An experienced Grey Warden mage would likely be an ideal brewer and, according to the RPG, the Grey Wardens are aware of the existence of these herbs (or whatever they turn out to be), and have helped spread this knowledge across Thedas. Perhaps it was even the Grey Wardens at Ostagar who told the Kennel Master about the Wilds Flower.

And there you have it! My random thoughts collected in a slightly less random post.

Drink in good health!

-MM

#dragon age #dragon age awakening #dragon age the calling #dragon age meta #grey wardens #blight #taint #the architect #taint cure #thedas medicine #thedas magic #morta's musings #long post

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